


ZUTTER

by The_Clamp



Category: Big Bang (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Criminals, Anal Sex, Best Friends, Dom/sub Undertones, Drug Dealing, Drug Use, Edging, Explicit Sexual Content, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, GTOP, M/M, Minor Character Death, Murder, Oral Sex, References to Drugs, Rough Sex, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-16
Updated: 2019-03-03
Packaged: 2019-05-24 03:21:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 41,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14946638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Clamp/pseuds/The_Clamp
Summary: Inspired by the MV for Zutter.Two loser small-time criminals down on their luck and in trouble with the wrong people. Will whey hit it big? And is the high life all it’s cracked up to be?





	1. Headache

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys it’s my return to writing fic after a few years out so please be kind ^^; 
> 
> It’s mostly written but posting the first chapter to see what you all think.  
> First chapter will be kinda short just to test the waters a little but later chapters will be longer.

The sun beamed offensively through the dirty window directly onto Jiyong’s closed eyelids. He groaned to himself and turned over, turning his back on the light. But it was too late. He was awake now and his head was killing him. Rubbing a hand over his face he vaguely registered in his brain that he was in the bed alone and groaned again before finally biting the bullet and practically threw himself out of the bed, the blanket had been twisted around his legs threatening to trip him as he shook himself free. Now that he was upright he paused and waited for the full effect of the night before to show itself. Sure enough the dull grinding ache in the back of his skull turned into a full on stabbing pain as the wave of nausea hit. 

He staggered quickly across the hall and into the bathroom, dropped to his knees on the grubby tile floor and vomited into the toilet, shuddering because he could taste the alcohol he’d consumed again. After spending a few minutes retching and coughing his stomach finally started to calm down and he leant forward with his forehead resting on the rim of the toilet, he didn’t care if it wasn’t especially sanitary because the cold porcelain was welcome relief on his flushed sweaty skin. 

“My God, how are you so attractive?” Came a sarcastic voice to his right. 

Jiyong looked over in the direction of the familiar voice, his best friend Seunghyun laying fully clothed in the empty bath tub. “Fuck off, you look like a bag of smashed assholes, too.” His voice came out scratchy and he coughed again to clear his throat.

Seunghyun just gave a slightly amused look. He felt pretty awful himself but he generally had a better time the next morning than Jiyong usually had. The night before was a blur and his head was killing him but really the only other symptom he was experiencing was the back pain from apparently sleeping in the bath tub. He did look rough though, blonde hair sticking up all over and he looked like he hadn’t slept in days. 

“And why are you in there?” Jiyong continued as he stood up tentatively, legs a little shaky. 

“This is where I woke up.” The other man shrugged as if it were the most obvious answer in the world. 

Jiyong didn’t signify that with a reply and just peered into the cracked mirror. His red hair was sticking to his forehead with sweat at the front and sticking up against gravity at the back where it had gone all fluffy and frizzy. The colour was fading too, turning more of a dusty orange in places and the ends and his natural colour growing in at the roots. His eyeliner was smudged half way down his face and when he looked closer he could see a fresh bruise developing along his left cheekbone. He searched his memory for an explanation but frankly everything was just a blurry fog of alcohol and pills. He looked down his body to check for any other damage, at least he’d managed to strip himself down to his underwear before passing out. 

“How’s your face? One of the Boss’ goons came to remind us how much money we owe him and you threw your drink in his face. Don’t think I’ve ran so fast in my life.” Seunghyun chuckled to himself as he clambered out of the dry bath tub. Not that it would fill anyway since there was a huge hole in it. “You were lucky to get off lightly.” He informed the shorter man, giving him a playful but slightly rough slap on the back as we walked past him, heading to the kitchen in search of coffee. 

The two best friends had been selling drugs small-time and indulging in petty crime to varying degrees since they were teenagers. But they’d grown tired of being losers even by criminal standards they had recently begged the boss to trust them with a large consignment of cocaine. They had been cutting it and banging it up in their apartment when a group of armed men broke in and took it all. Every last grain of powder. They kept a gun for emergencies but it was nowhere within reach and neither of them were willing to make a break for it while having guns pressed against the backs of their heads. They’d had no idea who the masked men were. Members of a rival gang maybe? It didn’t matter though. They were held fully responsible for the loss. Now they owed the boss more money than either of them really wanted to think about. Jiyong had gotten enough money from a loan shark to keep the him off their backs for at least a few weeks but now they just found themselves with even more debt to pay. 

Jiyong washed his face with cold water in the hopes it might make him feel a little more human, his cheek was starting to really hurt now too. After taking one last look in the mirror he sighed heavily and followed after his friend through to the kitchen, glancing around for where he might have thrown his phone when he got in last night. It caught his eye laying on the floor by the front door and grabbed it, inspecting it for damage. 

He turned around, seeing Seunghyun leaning against the counter in the tiny kitchen, a sort of blank stare on his face with an unlit cigarette hanging from his lips. “Those things will kill you” Jiyong joked, hoping to snap the man out of his trance. 

“Hnn?” Seunghyun looked up. “Oh. The cigarette? Doesn’t matter. This time next week they’ll be finding our corpses chopped up and stuffed into duffle bags washing up on the riverbank.” The thing about Seunghyun was that he had an incredibly dark sense of humour and even Jiyong after all these years didn’t always know when he should laugh or not. This was one of those times.

“Don’t talk Bullshit. It’s gonna be fine.” The redhead retorted, wishing he was as confident as he sounded. 

“You can’t seriously believe that. What are we gonna do? Magic some money out of nowhere?” He snapped and lit his cigarette. “We are so fucked that it’s actually almost funny.” He added sharply. It was unusual for him to be so short with his friend and he regretted it the instant the words left his lips, though he didn’t let it show on his face. 

Jiyong just narrowed his eyes at his tone and headed back to the bathroom to scrub away the night before from his skin. He hated the unclean feeling that had started to get oh so familiar over the last few years. This just lifestyle wasn’t really fun anymore, he wasn’t getting any younger after all. 

He didn’t want to admit the other man was probably right about the situation either and once sufficiently clean he wrapped a towel around his narrow hips and went to get dressed. As he stared into his closet his brain drifted to his friend’s words and he thought of his mother being called to identify what was left of his body. He hadn’t spoken to her in so long, she probably had no idea this is what her son’s life had become. He didn’t really notice the quiet tears slipping down his cheeks until a pair of arms embraced him from behind, pulling him back out of his thoughts. 

“I’m sorry Jiyongie...” Seunghyun had always hated seeing him cry. A long but not uncomfortable silence drew on between them. They’d known each other long enough to not feel the need to constantly fill any silences. 

“You’re right... I know you’re right. We sold my car, for what little it was worth. We sold the TV, the coffee table, your computer and my good headphones. What else can we do to make money fast?” The thing he was most upset about was the car. It was basically trash on wheels but he’d had good memories in that car. 

Seunghyun hummed and Jiyong could feel the vibration of his chest against his back. “We could always sell your body while your face is still cute.” 

The redhead made a noise like he was considering the option. 

“I was kidding, Ji. I don’t want to end up catching all kinds of diseases from you.” He let go of him with a playful shove. “They’d want a refund when they realise what a brat you are. You’re too high maintenance to be a hooker.” 

Jiyong snorted indignantly. “Bet you’d pay for me.”

“Why pay for something I can get for free?” He flashes a smile before disappearing out of the room. 

 

——————

 

It was probably not advisable for the pair to spend what little money they had on alcohol but jiyong pointed out that it was a drop in the ocean compared to their insane amount of debt. Seunghyun couldn’t really argue with that logic. They found themselves in a familiar place. The kind of club where even the walls were sweaty. 

Seunghyun was propping himself up on the bar when Jiyong slid up to him from supposedly nowhere with a playful expression on his face. Even with enough alcohol to make him unsteady on his feet he could never forget his problems quite as easily as the younger man. Then he realised why he had a look of such mischief as Jiyong stuck his tongue out and there was a little pill sitting on it. More than half the time he declined any offers of drugs, too many bad experiences but with the overwhelming feeling of not having much else to lose he pulled him into an open mouthed kiss, taking the pill from him in the process before breaking away to swallow it with the cheap vodka he was drinking. 

Jiyong barely let him swallow the thing before he was pulling his friend back in for another messy kiss and the blond almost stumbled right on top of him. 

“What was it?” Seunghyun slurred against those pretty lips. 

“Something that’ll make it fucking mind-blowing if you let me suck your dick when it kicks in.” he purred against the angle of his jaw. 

“But it’s always mind-blowing when you suck me off, Jiyongie.” 

Jiyong just grinned and lead him out to the alley behind the place. There was a woman throwing up in the gutter and a few people smoking out there but it wasn’t the kind of place where people gave a fuck about someone getting a blowjob against the wall. 

Jiyong pushed the taller man up against the wall, grinding up against him with his hips and kissing his throat. “Not too drunk to get it up I hope.” he teased with a grin. It was a rare occasion his friend was drunker of the two. 

Jiyong imagined the night proceeding how it had on a number of occasions, with him coaxing that dominant side out of Seunghyun. He loved being manhandled and thrown around the bed by him. Loved hearing that deep voice telling him what to do. He loved pushing him by dropping a cheeky teasing comment and he loved feeling so complete when he woke up with Seunghyun‘s arm slung around him. He loved it so much that he’d stopped sleeping with anybody else almost two years ago. Not that he’d admit that to Seunghyun. 

What he hadn’t expected though, was a sudden splitting pain in the back of his head just as he planted his hands against the cold brick wall either side of the blond. Then there was a feeling of falling, a blackness and a ringing in his ears followed by nothingness.


	2. Silence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to chapter 2! Hope you will enjoy and that it meets expectation.

Jiyong started to regain consciousness. He was too familiar with waking up in strange places with no recollection of how he got there, though it was normally as a result of drugs and alcohol. 

The first thing his brain registered was the fact he was shivering because it was cold. Really fucking cold. The second thing he realised was that he was on a hard floor. He cracked open his eyes to see his best friend laying next to him unconscious. He sat up slowly, wincing at the pain in the back of his skull and brought his hand up to where it hurt. He felt dry blood matted in his hair where the tender spot was. Shit. What the fuck had happened? Last thing he remembered they were outside the bar. 

He scrubbed his hands over his face and looked around. They appeared to be shut in a walk-in freezer, accompanied by a couple of crates and some hanging pig carcasses attached to meat hooks in the ceiling.

“What shit is this now?” He mumbled to himself and crawled over to Seunghyun to give him a gentle shake, relieved when he man groaned a little. At least he was alive. 

He hauled himself to his feet and tried his luck with the door but of course it was locked. He looked around for some other means of escape but there was nothing. What did he even expect? He moved back over to Seunghyun and knelt down to give him a firmer shake this time. 

“Seunghyun? Seunghyun! Wake up. We’re in trouble. C’mon Hyung. I know you ain’t dead!”

Another groan. 

Jiyong made a frustrated noise and nudged his friend over onto his back and paused a second. “You asked for it.” He warned the unconscious man before he rubbed his knuckles hard into the centre of his sternum. 

The blond’s eyes flew open and he sat bolt upright, swatting at Jiyong. “Oh my God what the FUCK?!” he brought his hand up to rub his chest. “You ass!” 

“Sorry, you weren’t waking up and I always wanted to try that out. Apparently it hurts like hell.” The admission just earned him a sharp glare from Seunghyun until the situation dawned on him. 

“What happened? Why are we in a freezer?”

“I don’t know but the door is locked. I assume the boss decided to collect his debts...”

“We better think of something quick before we end up like our friends here.” Seunghyun motioned to the hanging pig carcasses. “I’d confidently guess this is the old slaughter house since they’re in here. I know the boss keeps pigs too because they’re actually a great way to get rid of bodies, too. They will literally eat the entire corpse. Even the bones and the clothes that were on it.”

Jiyong gave him a look which lands somewhere between disgust and exasperation. “Thank you for that information. I can die happy now I know I’m gonna be pig food. Who knows shit like that anyway? I swear you were a serial killer in a past life!” Then again the his friend had always had a morbid fascination with death and it’s processes. Jiyong should be used to hearing about it. It was different now though, it was all a little too close to home. Too real. He got back up and banged on the door before kicking it with his heavy boot in frustration. 

“Great idea, Jiyongie. Maybe you should try yelling for them to let us out. That’ll show ‘em.”

“Got any better ideas?!” The panic started to rise in the younger man’s chest, kicking at the door again and as he felt tears prickling at his eyes. He was shaking from both the cold and the fear that had overcome him. That realisation that they could very well be living their final moments was gripping at his insides. His chest was feeling right. 

“Jiyong. Come sit.” Accompanied by a firm hand on hi shoulder, that deep and assertive voice broke though the sound of Jiyong’s own pulse pounding in his ears and grounded him. He never stopped wondering what he’d do without someone who was able to calm him so easily. 

He let himself be guided over to sit on the crates against the wall. There they sat, Jiyong with his knees drawn up and his sleeves pulled down over his hands to try and keep his fingers warm. He leaned against Seunghyun‘s shoulder for both warmth and that comfortably familiar closeness as the man handed him a cigarette and dug his lighter out of his pocket. 

“Shoot. You might have to try.” Seunghyun struggled trying to work the lighter with his freezing cold fingers. Jiyong took it from him and fumbled with great difficulty. 

Eventually he got the flame going but actually lighting he cigarette between his friend’s lips as they both shivered was quite another matter and it made Seunghyun chuckle a little. Eventually they got both cigarettes lit. 

Seunghyun put an arm around him and pulled him closer. There was a long silence between them. It wasn’t like their usual comfortable silences where they’d just sit in each others company. It had a melancholy atmosphere to it and maybe a hint of tension. They’d been in tight situations before but not quite like this. The quietness continued for what seemed like hours but was probably only minutes. 

Finally it was broken by Jiyong speaking up. 

“Can I t-tell y-you something...?” His teeth were staring to chatter. 

“No.” Seunghyun replied bluntly. His expression was like stone and he didn’t look at Jiyong. 

“Why n-not?” 

“Because.”

“Because what? You d-dunno what I’m g-gonna say.” 

“You’re g-gonna say something b-because you think we’re gonna die...” His expression remained hard and unchanged. He could admit to himself he was pretty convinced at this point it was curtains for both them but he didn’t want Jiyong to think like that too. 

“P-Please l-let me say it.” 

“No.” His tone sounded pretty final. 

Jiyong opened his mouth again to say something else when there was the sudden ear splitting sound of an alarm. He looked up and saw a smoke detector on the ceiling flashing. The cigarettes must have set it off. He was about to make a comment to the fact when the door was ripped open. Were it not for their limbs being stiff from the cold and laying on the floor for God knows how long they would have made a break for it but instead they sat there dumbly as armed men dragged them out. 

“Knew I should have just shot the two of you when I had the chance.” One of them said casually, gun digging into Seunghyun‘s temple as they walked them through what was indeed a disused slaughter house. It was full of flies and the smell of dead flesh and the pigs that kept in a run surrounded by razor wire. 

Something suddenly connected in Jiyong’s brain. He knew he recognised the man’s voice. He recognised that gun that was manning into his friend’s skull too. It had Roman numerals scratched roughly into the barrel. This guy had been the one who stole the cocaine from them. He was one of the boss’ right hand men. It made sense now. How anyone would know they even had all of those drugs. He’d just have to let Jiyong and Seunghyun take the blame for losing the drugs, wait for it to die down and sell them himself. 

They were forced down into two chairs and tied down tightly. They both received a swift punch across the face. They knew better than to try and fight off a load of armed men but when a large man in an apron and balaclava stepped forward with a car battery and jumper cables the two friend’s eyes widened. They knew about this guy. People called him Pretty Boy. Probably one of those ironic nicknames since they were sure nobody had seen his actual face. 

They struggled against the restraints now as the electricity fixed and crackled. The man gave Jiyong a zap through the shoulder, causing him to yelp and convulse for a second and leaving him subdued. 

“Boys, boys, boys. Now I know you two weren’t out last night pissing my money up against a wall, were you?” Came a gruff voice from the shadows. It was the boss. He stepped forward arrogantly, lighting a cigar. 

Jiyong was still stunned from the electric shock. Head flopped forward. 

“No. Not at all, Sir.” Seunghyun piped up in a bare faced lie. One of the men smacked him across the face with the grip of his gun, leaving blood trickling from the bridge of his nose. 

“You will. Not. LIE TO ME! Time’s up. You idiots lost me a lot of money! Yet you have the audacity to go out partying?!” The boss’ voice boomed, snapping Jiyong out of his haze. 

Seunghyun was about to say something else that would probably result in another good pistol whipping but he was interrupted. 

“We’ll have your money in two weeks, Sir! Two weeks I promise. If not, we’ll come here ourselves and you can do whatever you want with us. No resistance. Make an example of us or sell our organs on the black market or sell us to human traffickers! Whatever! Please! Two weeks!” Jiyong yelled. Seunghyun looked at him like he was insane. 

There was silence in the top for a second as the boss leaned over and exhaled cigar smoke into Jiyong’s face. “Fine. Just because I’m a generous man. Maybe a little two generous. Two weeks. You bring the money here at 7pm. All of it. Got it? Otherwise you’ll be sorry you were ever born, Kid. Both of you.” The man stood up straight and turned abruptly. “Get them the fuck out of my sight.”

The pair were tossed violently out onto the street with a holler of “See you in two weeks!” after them. 

As soon as the door was slammed shut Jiyong grabbed his friend by the shoulders and dragged him away down the dark street before he could comment on what he’d said to the boss. 

“Jiyong that th—“ 

“He wished he’d killed us when we had the chance!”

Seunghyun looked even more confused. 

“The guy pushing a gun into the side of your head! It was him. The one who took our cocaine!” 

“...Are you sure?”

“Of course! Think about it. Why else would he say that? We never had beef with him before and I recognise his gun! He waved it in my face enough after all! Glock 42 with Roman numerals scratched into it.”

“Alright... so what does that mean for us? What good does that do us? If we say anything it’s our word against his.”

“There’s no way he’s sold all that cocaine yet. He’d need the heat to die down so it doesn’t look suspicious. I bet you he’s got other stuff too. And a load of cash. We’re gonna steal it back and whatever else he’s got and then we’ll flip it real quick!”

“He’s a hardened criminal Jiyong! He’s probably armed to the teeth! You shot a gun once, missed the tree you were aiming for and hurt your wrist. You’re not Billy the Kid.” He looked up at the sky in exasperation. 

“You can shoot though!”

“That’s giving me a LOT of credit. I can shoot cans on a wall at close range.” He had to admit though, Jiyong’s plan was the only one they really had. They couldn’t even run, they’d be found eventually. “Alright... let’s talk about it at home.” 

 

 

—————

 

Once home, they sat down in the living room to discuss the plan. With an ice pack pressed firmly against Seunghyun‘s aching face they outlined that Jiyong would get this man’s name and address from one of the information brokers, trading some dirt he had on a politician he’d sold drugs to before. He’d also steal a car so they could make a swift getaway. It was unlikely a career criminal would have CCTV cameras but if he did Seunghyun would take them out. Once they had the drugs they’d cut and bag it before selling it cheap and quick. Hopefully any money they’d steal would make up the rest. However, there was one eventuality they hadn’t covered and the older was the one to broach the topic. 

“Thing is.... I don’t think there’s gonna be any going back after this... we’ll be bad guys. Real bad guys. Not petty crooks.” he looked over at the redhead. 

“We were gonna sell it anyway, though. You were all up for that. And so what we’re stealing. It’s our stuff we’re stealing back so it ain’t so bad.” Jiyong mused. 

“That’s not what I mean. He will kill us. Or his bodyguard will kill us. Because he probably has people hired to protect him. Even if he isn’t there when we arrive he’ll know it was us and he will come and find us. When he finds us he’ll blow out heads off. So what I’m saying is... we might have to.... y’know.”

“So you’re saying.... we have to...” Jiyong couldn’t quite get himself to say the rest of words.

“Kill him. Before he kills us. If we’re gonna do it. I frankly don’t see another option.” he watched Jiyong go pale at his words. 

“You’re right...” And just like that the gravity of their situation became very real. Even though this man would have no problem in ending them both it still felt like a hell of a line to cross. Before he could stop himself his bevy few words slipped out of his mouth. “Will you do it?”

“Me?”

“I-I don’t know if I could... I dunno. I’d be afraid I’d chicken out before I could shoot first.” 

Seunghyun would have protested but it was true he probably had more of a stomach for it than Jiyong. Its not like he actually had any desire to kill someone, he’s no psychopath, but he’d always considered that he’d have no problem with killing another human if it was in self defence or in defence of his friend. He was the more pragmatic of the two, the younger man had always been the more emotional one. 

He nodded. “Yeah. I’ll do it.” 

Jiyong leaned against him on their busted old couch. “We can do this. Two of us against the world.” He laced his fingers with Seunghyun‘s while his friend’s other hand absently played with his faded red hair. 

“That’s right.”

“Don’t get killed. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” It was true. Jiyong didn’t think he could live without the other man. 

“I’m not going anywhere without a fight. Don’t worry. Neither of us are.” 

“I...” he decided against finishing his sentence. 

 

Time gently floated by unnoticed. They sat in a nest of comforting quiet for over an hour until Jiyong turned and pressed his lips against his friend’s jawbone. 

“Seeing your life flash before your eyes gets you horny does it, Jiyongie?”

“Mmmhmm.” Really, Jiyong just wanted that comfort, that closeness. The intimacy. He wouldn’t admit that though. He felt guilty sometimes, like he was lying to his friend by letting him believe he was only in it for the physical kicks. The most that he’d admit to would be that it’s a welcome distraction from their situation and life in general. 

Seunghyun turned his head and brought their lips together. They kiss hurt a little from when they were punched. It was worth it though. The younger man’s lips travelled to the bridge of the blond’s nose. “I’ll kiss this better for you.” 

“Ouch. I’d rather you didn’t. There’s plenty of other places to put your mouth.”

“Aw poor baby.” The redhead purred as he shifted his position so he was straddling Seunghyun‘s lap and placed his hands on his shoulders, pushing him back into the couch. He knew exactly the kind of reaction taking the dominant position would elicit from the man. 

“You comfy there?” Seunghyun arched an eyebrow. 

“Very.” He let his lips hover over Seunghyun‘s. Daring him to close the gap like a game of chicken. “What’s the matter, Hyung? Don’t you want me?” He punctuated his question by rolling his hips forward, grinding them into his. 

Seunghyun stifled a groan, not about to give Jiyong the satisfaction. 

“What does Hyung want to do to me?” 

With those words Jiyong had one. Seunghyun closed the space between their lips and brought a hand up to the back of the younger’s head, pulling his hair slightly and tipping his head back so that he could bite and suck his way down that beautiful neck. 

“I’ll tell you what I want to do to you.” He sucked on an especially sensitive patch of skin where a previous hickey was still fading. “I want undo you. Strip away that cocky attitude. Take it away piece by piece until you’re a fucking mess. Moaning, trembling and begging for it.” He cupped Jiyong’s face to look him in the eyes. “And it won’t take long, will it? Because you love it so much. I can feel you getting hard against me just from hearing my words.”

It was true, Jiyong was half hard already. Fuck he loved hearing that voice talking dirty to him. 

“I asked you a question, Jiyongie.”

“Nnhhh no it won’t take long. I do fucking love it but so do you. You can’t get enough of my body, can you?” Jiyong loved to push. 

“Get to the bedroom. You better be naked and on the bed when I get in there or you’ll be sorry. You best not touch yourself either.” He released his hair from his grip so that Jiyong could get up. 

And get up he did. He practically flew into the bedroom embarrassingly fast, and Seunghyun had to smile to himself. 

He casually extracted himself from the couch and wandered to the kitchen where he fished a cigarette out of the packet on the counter and lit it. The wait was going to drive him crazy but he knew it was drive Jiyong even more crazy. 

The redhead had stripped off and thrown his clothes onto the floor. He was now sitting on the bed waiting in anticipation, his erection begging for attention. The smell of cigarette smoke drifted into the room and he realised what the other man was doing. 

“Oh my God. You’re an ass! I’m gonna kill you before the cigarettes do!” He groaned in frustration and flopped onto his back with his eyes closed. He heard the door squeak and he opened his eyes again, finding himself looking up at the blond. He looked even taller than he was from this angle. 

“Oh really?” He took a steady drag of the cigarette. 

“Please Hyung.” He pushed out his lower lip. 

“You’ll have to wait until I finish this.” Seunghyun leaned against the closet and looked at Jiyong with intense and hungry eyes, like some kind of predator eyeing up it’s prey. 

Jiyong groaned again. It took a tremendous amount of willpower not to touch himself, to the point he had to sit on his hands. He had no idea how Seunghyun had such self control. He couldn’t even look at the man smoking in the corner of the room. He could feel his eyes on him and that was enough. 

When that damn cigarette was finished Jiyong let out an audible sigh of relief. But his torture was not over yet. Seunghyun slipped his jacket off excruciatingly slowly and dropped it on the floor. Then oh so slowly slipped off his tshirt before finally joining his friend on the bed. 

Jiyong’s hands grabbed at that perfect torso. Such warm smooth skin stretched over lean muscle. So fucking perfect. His glee was short lived as Seunghyun grabbed his wrists and pinned them to the madness above his head. 

“No touching. I’m not tying you up either. You’ll just have to learn to control yourself.” 

Jiyong whined in protest as the firm grip left his wrists. Instead Seunghyun dropped kisses down his torso, each one felt like fire on his skin. One hand ran down a pale narrow hip, thumb swiping over the hipbone. The other planted on the bed as he kissed over the red agitated skin of his shoulder where he’d been electrocuted. 

Jiyong rolled his hips upwards for contact but Seunghyun stayed clear. He moved down his body and hitched up one of Jiyong’s legs so he could nip with his teeth at the sensitive tender flesh of his inner thigh. 

“Mmhh God please....”

“Please what?” He let his tongue flick out over where he’d bitten him. 

“I dunno. Anything. Please...”

With that Seunghyun licked the head of his straining cock and Jiyong did his best to keep his hips still, even when he felt that tongue glide all the way from the base of his shaft up to the head. 

“Please I need more!” Jiyong was always loud in bed and that’s the way Seunghyun liked it. He obliged and took him into his mouth, sucking gently as he bobbed his head up and down the shaft and swallowing against his gag reflex. 

There were no words to describe how badly Jiyong wanted to grab onto some part of him. Any part of him. But he wasn’t allowed to touch and he wasn’t about to mess up and give his friend and excuse to make him wait again. A lot of the time he was up for spending most of the night building up to it, but not tonight.

Seunghyun would work his tongue over the head on the upstroke, knowing it was exactly what drove Jiyong crazy. He could tell by the way he was moaning he was already getting close to the edge and so he pulled off with an obscene ‘pop’. The loss of contact earned a whine from the man under him. 

“Fuck please Seunghyun“

“You’re so damn needy.” He reached over to the bedside table and grabbed a bottle of lube. “Hands and knees.” His voice was dominant and commanding. Just the way Jiyong liked it. He obeyed and flipped him self over. 

Seunghyun took a moment to free himself of his sweats and underwear, finally setting his erection free as Jiyong looked back with desperate lust filled eyes. 

“Since you got a lot to say for yourself tonight, what does Jiyongie want?”

“I want you to fuck me. Make me scream, Hyung” 

Seunghyun’s strong hands grabbed Jiyong’s hips and pulled his ass up higher and then parted his legs more. Jiyong dropped from his hands to his elbows and muffled a groan into the pillow. He squeaked in surprise when cold lube was dripped into the cleft of his ass and it made him shiver slightly as some of it ran down his inner thighs. He could feel the amusement radiating off the man behind him. 

“Why do you look so fucking good like this?” Seunghyun dragged a long finger through the lube and teased at his entrance, feeling Jiyong push back slightly. He slipped a finger into that tight warmth. “So impatient.” He crooked his finger teasingly close to that little bundle of nerves inside. 

“Ahh please...” Jiyong groaned into the pillow. He wanted to feel stretched and one finger just wasn’t enough. 

The blond worked a second finger inside him, scissoring to open him up. “And get your face out of that pillow. I wanna hear you.” He tugged Jiyong’s head back sharply by his hair at the same time as he pressed his fingers into just the right spot. 

Jiyong gave a yelp which was a mix of surprise and pleasure. “There!” 

As soon as Seunghyun decided Jiyong was stretched enough he squeezed more lube out of the bottle into his hand and started to stroke his own neglected cock, allowing himself to let a deep moan escape. Then he finally began to slide into that firm perky ass. 

Jiyong felt the stretch and the burn. His breaths came heavy and uneven, it felt so good being stretched open and filled so completely. Nothing else in the world mattered right now. He arched his back and tipped his head back once he felt Seunghyun fully inside him he gave himself a couple of seconds adjust and then started rocking his hips back and mumbling garbled nonsense.

Seunghyun grabbed those perfect hips firmly, it’s was like they were made to fit his hands. His fingertips were digging into soft skin, he started to thrust his hips with a steady pace. 

“Fuck you feel so good. Your pretty ass is so fucking tight.” He leaned over and breathed against the hot sweaty skin at the back of Jiyong’s neck. “You drive me fucking crazy, Ji.”

“H-Harder!”

Seunghyun brought his palm down sharply against Jiyong’s thigh. “You forgot to say-” another hard slap “-Please.” 

Jiyong gasped at the impact of each strike. “Harder... pl-aahhh yes!” He practically screamed when Seunghyun started thrusting harder and faster, his strong grip keeping the younger man’s hips in place. He knew exactly what angle he needed to hit Jiyong’s sweet spot, too. 

Once the pace was set he snaked a hand around to grab Jiyong’s needy cock and started to stroke it in time with each thrust. The stimulation was almost too much for Jiyong and his arms were trembling as he tried to hold his position and when they gave out Seunghyun pulled him back up firmly and slapped the side of his thigh again. “Pillow princess...” 

“F-Fuck you..” Jiyong was sure he’d laugh about the irony of that statement later. He let out a gasping moan as another slap landed on his thigh, right at the time an extra hard thrust landed into his prostate. He was practically trembling all over now, spiralling towards release 

“Cum for me, Jiyongie.” 

The redhead didn’t have to be told twice. He threw his head back and his body strained as the waves of pleasure crashed into him. “Ahh! Seunghyun!” 

Seunghyun kept fucking into him through his orgasm, the feeling of his muscles contorting around his cock sending him over the edge with him. He came in hot spurts deep inside the other man. 

The two collapsed together on the bed, Jiyong groaning in sick satisfaction at the feeling of cum trickling down his inner thighs. They laid there a moment and caught their breath until Seunghyun rolled off to the side, not wanting to crush him. He wrapped an arm lazily around Jiyong’s narrow waist and rubbed him in closer, pressing a kiss to his shoulder. 

“You look so beautiful all fucked out.” His tone was soft and the words had drifted out of him before he could stop them 

Jiyong just nuzzled closer into his body heat in reply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Still getting back into the swing of writing so again constructive criticism is well received. 
> 
> I apologise for any grammatical errors as English is not my first language.


	3. Invincible

The two friends sat at the edge of the Han River where it cut through Seoul. 

Seunghyun sat facing upstream, his knees pulled up so he could rest his arms on them. Jiyong was sat behind him with his legs stretch out, their backs resting against each other.   
It was dusk and the sky was burning orange as it started to sink below the city’s skyline. There was still a soft warmth in the air and it bathed their skin in its glow. The water trickled by steadily, it’s gentle sounds somehow audible over the noise of the city around them as glittered in the dying sun. 

If Jiyong could take this exact moment and stay in it forever, he would. They came here often, it was one of their favourite places to spend an evening away from their crappy apartment and sticky alcohol soaked bars. Even with the party animal he was considered by most to be it was a welcome escape into tranquility. 

Jiyong’s eyes drifted to see a number of pigeons pecking at some garbage that had washed up on the riverbank. He thought to himself for a moment how he wasn’t much different from a pigeon. Scratching through filth, looking for something. Anything. Then again, maybe he actually had more in common with the garbage. Unwanted and rotting, waiting for someone or something to come along and find something worthwhile in him. Laughter suddenly bubbled up in him at the thought. 

“Gonna let me in on the joke?” Seunghyun inquired. 

“You’re my pigeon!” He forced the words out through the laughter. “And I’m the trash!”

“Uh... right. Ok?” He smiled despite his confusion. He loved hearing his friend laugh and he didn’t hear it often enough these days. Genuine, happy, sober laughter. “Should I even ask what thought process lead you to that conclusion?”

“Nope.” Jiyong scooted himself over to the side slightly so he wasn’t leaning against Seunghyun‘s back anymore and lay down next to him instead with a wide grin on his face. 

“You’re such a weirdo.” Seunghyun reached over and ruffled his hair. 

“So are you!”

“Yeah. I guess.”

Jiyong must have fallen asleep because it felt like one second he was looking up at orange sky and the next he was opening them to the inky black night and Seunghyun‘s jacket draped over him. 

Apparently he’d been too cute to wake up. It was almost midnight when the pair wandered home together. 

 

———————

 

The next day was almost disturbingly normal, considering what they were about to do that night. No going back now. They were both as ready as they’d ever be and their plan was straightened out. 

Jiyong went out just before it got dark to acquire them a car. It had been a couple of years since he’d stolen a vehicle but it was an art he’d perfected as a teenager. He and Seunghyun used to ride around in stolen sports cars instead of going to school. Good times. Simpler times. When they both thought they were invincible. What he wouldn’t give to feel that again. 

He wandered around for an hour looking for the perfect ride. In the back of his mind he knew it made sense to get something which wouldn’t stand out too much. But then he saw it. The perfect car was practically calling to him from a poorly lit parking lot. Frankly if you’re dumb enough to leave something like that in a place like this you deserve to have it stolen, he thought to himself. 

Meanwhile, Seunghyun stood on a street corner, waiting. And waiting. And waiting. How long did it take to steal a damn car? He tried to stop himself wondering if maybe Jiyong had been caught. He looked up when he heard a car pulling up and music blasting out it’s stereo. He didn’t have to wait for the driver to become visible to know it was Jiyong. 

The redhead was pulled up in an expensive looking convertible with the roof down, grinning like a madman as he lifted his sunglasses. “Going my way, baby?” He have a playful wink. 

“Nice ride.” Seunghyun laughed. Should you really be driving in sunglasses at night?” He tossed a roll of black trash bags onto the back seat and climbed in, hopping over the door rather than opening it. 

“I do whatever I want.”

“And what the hell are you dressed as? You look like a fucking pimp.” The blond laughed. Then he reached over and pulled at the red surgical mask on his friend’s face. “Oh, and what the fuck is this? You think it makes you look tough?”

“Hey don’t touch the goods! It’s called STYLE, you ass.” He swatted his hand away and hit the gas.

“Just try not to kill us in this thing, yeah? Fast cars make you drive like a lunatic.” 

When they found the right apartment building they parked the car in an alley behind it. Once the engine was switched off the mood tensed slightly. Seunghyun took the gun from his belt and checked it over. He noticed Jiyong watching him. 

“Got you this. You should at least have some kind of self defence.” He passed Jiyong a taser. “I know you carry a switchblade but I would feel happier if you had this too.”

Jiyong nodded and grabbed the roll of bags as they climbed out of the car. 

The building itself didn’t have security on the door which was fortunate. They stood in silence in the elevator. The nerves getting to them and making them both sweat. When they reached the top floor they walked along quickly to the right door number and stopped in front of it, each waiting for the other to knock. Eventually, it was Jiyong who gave in knocked firmly. 

The seconds passed by like hours until the door opened. 

“What a surprise. How’s the nose, Seunghyun?” The man smirked upon seeing the two, referring to the pistol whipping days before. Yeah, this was the guy. 

“We’ve come for our merchandise back.” Jiyong sounded much braver than he actually felt. 

The man laughed harshly. But not for long. Seunghyun pushed him back from the doorway and advanced inside like an unstoppable force, Jiyong followed and closied the door behind them quickly. 

The scene escalated instantly as the blond grabbed the man, pulled the gun from his waistband and shoved the barrel in the man’s mouth, probably chipping teeth on its way. 

“Where do you keep it!? The gear and any money you have around here!” he noticed the man’s hands move, maybe to grab a weapon. “HANDS UP!” His voice comes so loud that even Jiyong jolts in surprise. He knew all too well how scary his friend was capable of being, usually it was an act but sometimes it wasn’t. Jiyong couldn’t always tell the difference. 

The man complied and raised his hands. 

“We aren’t fucking around. You better point us in the right direction. Jiyong. Give him a taste of that electric shock you had. Maybe it’ll persuade him.” 

Jiyong almost forgot he was a participant rather than just a spectator in this. He took the taser out of his pocket, turned it up and jabbed the prongs into the man’s shoulder just as soon as Seunghyun pulled the gun back from his mouth. 

The man gritted his teeth and convulsed. Once he recovered and saw the gun was still trained on him he pointed to a picture in a frame on the wall. 

“I got it.” Jiyong went to investigate. The painting was hiding a safe built into the wall behind it. 

“It’s a safe!” He he calls through. 

“Code. Now.” His voice sounded so cold and dark. 

“23-21-18-52. Go ahead. I’m gonna come find you two losers and you’ll wish the Boss had gotten to you first.”

Jiyong put the numbers in carefully and opened it up. It was full of stacks of money and bales of cocaine. “Whoa...” he grabbed the contents quickly, rushing and filling the two of the trash bags. He just wanted to get the fuck out of there with the loot. “I’ve got it! There’s shit loads of money in here too!”

“Gonna be hard to come find us with a hole through your head.” Seunghyun‘s gaze hadn’t faltered. 

“You ever killed someone before?” 

Seunghyun stayed silent, trying not to let his demeanour slip. He was scared but he pushed that feeling down deep inside himself. This was something he had to do. He was going to kill this man. 

Jiyong came back to his side with the bags and saw the blond was wearing an expression he’d never seen before. It was set in a totally emotionless stare. 

“You think I can’t? Seunghyun finally said calmly. 

Jiyong wanted to tell him he didn’t have to do this but what else would they do? 

“No. I don’t think you got it in you. So go run along with your little fag friend and I’ll be seeing you both real soon. Especially him. I bet he’d make a cute girl. I know a lot of guys who’d think he’s cute. I could make a little money out of him.” With that, something in Seunghyun’s expression shifted and he clenched his jaw. Something flashed through his eyes, too. He didn’t consider himself to be a violent person but there were two things which never failed to provoke him. One was being taunted. Another was someone making threats against his friend. This man was doing both. 

Seunghyun finally cut the tension in the room and let out a sharp breath. Then in one quick movement he pressed the gun square in the middle of the man’s forehead. “I want to see the split second of realisation in your eyes when I pull this trigger.” Without another beat there was the ear splitting bang of the gunshot. 

Silence. 

Jiyong watched as the now vacant body flop to the floor like a sack of meat. It was almost like it was in slow motion. He didn’t hear him hit the floor, though. There was just a muffled ringing in his ears over the sound of the bullet casing rattling across the floor into silence. 

Seunghyun stood perfectly still. Blood was spattered over his arm, face and t-shirt. 

Silence and ringing. Silence and ringing.

The gun was still raised in his hand. Eyes fixed to the empty space in front of him. 

Just ringing. Deafening ringing. 

 

“Seunghyun....?” Jiyong could barely hear his own voice. He reached out a tentative hand to land on the now trembling wrist which held up the gun. “Seunghyun... we need to leave...” his voice was quiet and almost begging. 

Seunghyun seemed to come back to earth with a bang as he snatched his hand away from  
Jiyong and turned abruptly on his heel toward the door, grabbing one of the bags. 

The two of them fled the scene without a single exchange of words between them, they threw themselves unto the car with the bags and sped off. Jiyong needed to speak, needed to know what was going on in his friends head but he knew he had to wait until they were safely back in their apartment. He could feel the tension radiating off the man next to him like he was about to explode. Or implode. Maybe the act of killing another human being had fucked up his head. He wouldn’t blame him if it had. 

They hurried inside with the bags of money and cocaine. Jiyong dropped them on the floor and leaned against the wall, sliding his back down it until he reached the floor. Seunghyun crouched next to him, sitting on his haunches. 

“I can’t believe we actually did it. We actually pulled it off.” Seunghyun spoke before Jiyong could. 

“Are you ok?” 

“Uh... well yes and no.” Seunghyun took a long breath in and exhaled slowly. “I’m fine and I’m not sure if I’m ok with that. I thought I’d be more.... shaken? Maybe I’m just in shock.” 

Jiyong stared for a moment. He wasn’t sure what to say to that. Eventually he decides to risk cutting the tension with a joke. “Don’t get a taste for it and kill me in my sleep now, will you?” 

“Nah. I’ll keep you around. You’d be too hard to replace.” he ruffled the red messy hair. 

“Good.” He leaned his head onto his his friend’s shoulder. 

“So what now?”

“Sleep now. Count the money in the morning. Then cut the coke down. I can get rid of a lot of it at once by selling on bulk to the brothel at the back of the strip club. Can clear a load in one night at one of those illegal raves at the collage campus. They’re on every weekend. There really is a shit load of money though. I don’t think we’ll be far off paying our debt on that alone. We’ll probably get to keep some of it.” Jiyong explained. 

 

—————

 

The next day the pair sat in the middle of the living room floor surrounded by stacks of money. Seunghyun had his thick framed glasses on and was tapping away on a calculator, brow furrowed in concentration. 

“Did you include the piles over there?” Jiyong interjected. He was sitting on his hands looking excited like a kid unsupervised in a candy store.

“Sshh! You’re distracting me. And yes.” He picked up what was left of his cigarette from the ashtray next to him and took a last drag before stubbing it out and pushing his glasses back up his face. 

“I think you look pretty hot when you wear those.” 

“Jiyong, please. I’m trying to concentrate.” A few more taps of the calculator. “Pass the other calculator. Don’t press any of the buttons.”

Jiyong did as he was told and waited as his friend continued to click away at the numbers.

“Holy shit. Jiyong. The cash alone would cover our debt almost two times over. Including the debt to the loan shark. As for the cocaine, if we cut it as usual we can double it again on top of that! There’s way more here by weight than we had originally.” 

He could barely finish talking before the younger man practically leapt at him from across the room. 

“Are you fucking serious?! Oh my god Hyung! We made it! We can get a good car and a better apartment and a big TV and I can get those shoes I like! And that jacket!” He flung his arms around him, straddling his lap. “You sure on the numbers?”

“Yes I’m sure. I checked the numbers three times. I didn’t make a mista- -“ He was cut off by Jiyong crushing their lips together. Seunghyun brought his hand to the side of his face, thumb on his chin to coax him to part his lips. Jiyong did, happily letting their tongues meet. 

After a moment Jiyong broke away and picked up a wedge of money and stuffed it into the waistband of Seunghyun‘s sweats. “Buy some new clothes.” He grinned and leaned back in to suck at the older man’s lower lip, teasing at it with his teeth. 

“Shame you can’t buy a new personality.” He took his lips away from Jiyong’s teeth and moved them to the nape of his neck. “I could buy you a gag though.” He grumbled against soft skin. 

Jiyong mad a pleased little noise at the idea. He knew Seunghyun was only half joking and something about the notion excited him more and than it probably should have. 

Seunghyun picked up on his reaction and filed the idea away in his head for later use. How he’d love to see that smartass mouth held open around a ball gag. 

“...Hey Seunghyun? What if we kept it...?” Joking thought aloud. 

“Well we can keep most of it. Like I said.”

“I mean all of it.”

The blond drew back from him a little. “Doesn’t that kind of defeat the object? To pay off the debts?”

“We could use it to buy in bulk from the supplier. Sell on and keep our own profit.”

“I’m sure that’ll go down well with the boss.” he scoffed, looking at Jiyong like he was insane. Probably wasn’t far from the truth anyway. 

“Well... maybe he wouldn’t be around to have any say in it...” Jiyong crawled back up into Seunghyun‘s lap and reached to cup his face with his hands and look into his eyes. “We could pull it off if we wanted to.” He was high on their success. The promise of riches. More riches. Dangerous territory. He was known to get carried away easily. He was dangerous when he felt invincible and this was the first time in a long time he had felt that way. 

“Don’t think it would be quite so easy... for one thing we need to be careful the police don’t come knocking. You wouldn’t last 30 seconds in prison. Not with an ass like that.”

“Yes I would, I’d just be your prison bitch and nobody else would touch me. Besides, we’ll be careful this time.”

“Ever heard the phrase to quit while you’re ahead?”

“Why should we?” A solid argument. 

“We’ll flip the goods and then decide. This isn’t something to do on a whim.” Seunghyun always did have a problem saying no to him. He wanted to always protect Jiyong from himself but sometimes he got the better of him. He could be surprisingly manipulative when it came to getting his way, knowing how to push peoples buttons and that included Seunghyun‘s 

“Deal.”


	4. High

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter gets grittier.  
> Contains effects of drug use.

The money was rolling in. 

They’d both end up getting incredibly drunk most nights. Jiyong searching for the feeling of being alive and Seunghyun trying to kill something inside himself. Jiyong had even invested in a few bottles of prescription opiates to sell on at a profit. He bought new clothes and gambled in illegal casinos, it was fun. At least that’s what he thought fun felt like, anyway. He couldn't really remember. No, it was definitely fun. Dancing on blackjack tables with people gravitating to him, being the most popular person in the room. He almost felt like a someone worthwhile. It was more intoxicating than any drug he’d ever taken. 

Seunghyun was apparently content to kick back and watch Jiyong have his fun, within reason. Even when the redhead had two male prostitutes naked and making out with each other right on the top of the bar while he flicked bills at them. He did think Jiyong could do with learning some class, though. If he found himself too disapproving of the younger’s actions he’d just have another glass or two of whisky. He wanted Jiyong to be happy. Long as he didn’t take too many steps over the line.

It wasn’t like Jiyong had a severe problem with drugs or alcohol, he just didn’t know when to stop when it came to just about anything. As if he didn’t even consider the concept of knowing his own limits. 

One night, Seunghyun had lost sight of Jiyong for a few hours in a scummy nightclub. It wasn’t especially unusual but as time passed he started to worry and found himself searching for his friend. He walked into the grubby men’s room to see the readhead sitting there on the piss soaked floor, he was in the corner at the end of the line of urinals and facing the wall with his knees drawn up. As Seunghyun got closer he could see him shaking. 

“Jiyong...?”

No answer. 

“Hey.” He put a firm hand on his friends shoulder, causing his head to snap up and look at him with wide eyes like a frightened animal. 

“Shit Jiyong. What the fuck?” He could feel his raised body temperature through his hand and the younger was dripping with sweat. Seunghyun put things together in his head quickly and reached for Jiyong’s wrist to check his pulse. It was hammering along insanely fast and at an irregular rate. At that moment he picked the smaller man up easily, tossing him over his shoulder in a fireman’s lift.

“Hey! L-Let me go!” It seemed Jiyong had come out of his own head with the rough handling and started thrashing about like a fish on a line. 

“We’re going home before you have a fucking stroke or a heart attack!” He kept ahold of him easily as he hurried out of the building. Thankfully they didn’t live too far away.

“Stop! Fuck you! You’re hurting me!”

Passers by were looking at them, probably wondering if they should help the flailing man or not.

“You’re such a brat when you’re high!” He brought a hand up and gave Jiyong a hard smack across the ass where his skinny jeans were riding down from the struggling. That shut him up just long enough to get him safely home where Seunghyun could drop him roughly onto the couch. 

The smaller man practically lept back onto his feet and shoved Seunghyun, who was taken off guard and stumbled back against the wall. 

“I fucking hate you!” Jiyong screamed at the top of his lungs.

“You don’t mean that. You need to take a sedative or you’re gonna hurt yourself.” He tried to keep his voice level, to hide his frustration. He slowly approached Jiyong like he was trying to catch a rabid fox. 

“Fuck you!” His body stuck in fight-or-flight mode, Jiyong lashed out and punched Seunghyun across the side of the face and tried to make a run for it while the older man was reeling from the surprise. Something in his brain was afraid of the inevitable come-down because the higher you flew the harder the landing and he was irrational enough to turn feral in order to avoid it.

Seunghyun managed to grab him around the waist and force him up against the wall, pinning his hands behind his back firmly so he couldn’t move. 

“You’re gonna take a benzo and you’re gonna swallow it. And if you even think about biting me I’ll kick your ass.” He forced out through gritted teeth. But his jaw relaxed when he heard anguish filled sobs bubble up from Jiyong. The younger man had gone from violent and desperate to babbling out through hysterical tears what Seunghyun could barely make out as begging. Begging for it to be over.

“It’s ok... come on...” he pulled Jiyong from the wall and into his arms. He felt so hot, like there were flames building up under his flushed sweaty skin. And so Seunghyun lead him along to lay on the cold bathroom floor and started stripping his clothes away to cool him down. He had seen his friend in a mess before and he’d been a mess himself a few times but nothing quite so bad as this. Especially when the redhead’s eyes rolled back into his head and his body began to jerk and stutter.

“Shit! Come the fuck on Ji!” Seunghyun grabbed the bottle of benzodiazepines from the bathroom cabinet and dropped to his knees to roll Jiyong onto his side so he wouldn’t choke on his tongue or vomit. “That’s it, I’ve got you. It’s ok.” 

He waited for the seizure to stop so he could place one of the pills on the back of Jiyong’s tongue and stroked his throat to get him to swallow. “Good, well done... need to slow your heart down...” He took one for himself, too. 

They lay on the bathroom floor for another hour until Seunghyun picked up the sleeping Jiyong and placed him in bed and left him to rest.

 

—————————

 

Jiyong woke up 10 hours later. Everything hurt. Every muscle in his body was screaming in agony and his head felt like he was under water.

He searched his foggy memory but the benzodiazepine had erased much of what happened. He vaguely remembered having to go sit in the corner of the men’s room at the club, seeking respite from the overstimulation in his brain. He remembered Seunghyun finding him there, too. That was about all, though. 

He clambered out of bed and made his way to the living room where Seunghyun sat with a bruise across his cheekbone, stubbing out the last of his cigarette. 

“What happened to your face?”

“You.” He didn’t look at Jiyong.

“Me?”

“You punched me.” 

“Did you deserve it?” Jiyong tiptoed. They’d both taken swings at each other in the past, even had a couple of actual fist fights. But apparently that had been the wrong thing to say because Seunghyun turned and looked at him with a sharp stare. If looks could kill...

“You OD’d. On cocaine. I was trying to help you.”

“Oh... fuck. Well thanks?” Another miscalculation on Jiyong’s part because his nonchalant tone seemed to make his friend snap as he shot up out of the chair and closed the distance between them. 

“You stupid selfish ass! You could have fucking died!” Seunghyun grabbed him by the front of his shirt and shook him, the motion making Jiyong’s head spin even more. “You dumb fuck! You just don’t know when to stop! You had a damn seizure! I thought I was gonna lose you... and then I’d have no reason left for living...” To Jiyong each word felt like a fresh deep cut but the knife twisting in his heart was the fact Seunghyun had tears in his eyes. He couldn’t remember the last time he saw his best friend cry. Seunghyun was usually the composed one, stoic even when things weren’t ok. 

“I... I’m sorry, Seung—“

“Shut the fuck up. That doesn’t mean anything.” His tone had gone from anguished to cold, angry and direct. Jiyong flinched. “Go shower. We have shit to do.” He released Jiyong, shoving him away.

Jiyong sloped off to the bathroom. Fuck, he felt horrible inside and out. Sick as a dog and the worst person in the world. He took his time showering, a little afraid to face his best friend again. He was shamed of himself.

When the redhead re-emerged into the living room he did his best not to look at Seunghyun. 

“We need to talk, Jiyong.”

“Look, I really am sorr—“

“I said I don’t wanna hear it. I wanna set a couple of ground rules since we’re considering getting into the dealing game pretty deep...” 

Jiyong looked over at him. 

“I don’t want you doing cocaine anymore. No using our own merchandise. If you feel the need to get buzzed then take something else or just get drunk like a normal person. But not enough to fuck yourself up. That was fucking scary last night, I’d never seen you like that before.”

“Ok... you’re right. I promise not to let that happen again... I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Seunghyun felt like a bit of a hypocrite. He was telling Jiyong to cut back on the drugs but he himself had been swallowing barbiturates and benzos every night to knock himself out into a dreamless sleep. He was just trying to extinguish thoughts he’d been having since he’d taken a life. Invasive thoughts. Thoughts that came when his mind was quiet. He could afford to let the, get to him. Jiyong needed him. 

 

———————

 

Jiyong stayed true to his word and didn’t touch anything other than alcohol up until the night before their deadline. They’d made more than enough money. 

The next morning Jiyong woke up alone and groggily shuffled to the kitchen in search of coffee. Today was the day. Crunch time. They still hadn’t discussed what they’d do tonight. If they’d had over the money or keep it.

“How can someone so pretty look so horrible when they’re hungover?” Seunghyun mumbles around the rim of his coffee cup. 

“Yeah well—“ he paused, speaking was making his stomach protest. “—you look fine. As usual.” He didn’t even have the resolve to argue. He needed coffee first. On the whole though, he’d take a hangover rather than a comedown any day.

“Jesus you sound horrible too. Maybe you should—“

“Go easy on the booze? I know. Already came to that conclusion. I’m turning into a pussy.” 

“Or getting old.” 

“How dare you!” Jiyong laughed, filled his coffee cup and padded over to the living room. “Oh and hey, time’s up now. Right? Tonight? Am I on the right day?” He sank himself into the armchair and closed his eyes. 

“Yeah. Still want to go it alone? Just us?” Seunghyun asked and looked over. 

“Fuck yes.”

“Then we’ll do it. You want the high life? It’ll be yours.”

“What?”

“I’m not doing it so you can go back to frying your brain or so you can pickle your liver instead. But you deserve to live comfortably. You deserve nice things. The things you want.” He looks down. “You were right. Why should we settle for shit? I want you to be happy.”

“Seriously?” A grin spread across Jiyong’s face. 

“Yeah. I’m already going to hell, anyway.”


	5. Filthy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys next chapter is here!  
> Warning: this chapter gets a little dark, there is some slightly gory descriptions towards the end in this one. I’ve tried to strike a balance with it being visceral enough to put across the effect on the characters but not to have it too stomach turning.

Seunghyun sat on the bed, cleaning the components of the gun. It was the first time he’d touched it since the night he’d taken a man’s life with it. It had almost been easy to pull the trigger that time. But now he was far more apprehensive. It felt different this time because now he’d experienced the repercussions. What if it made his sleepless nights worse? Would those intrusive thoughts be even louder? 

He made himself stop thinking about it. Instead he thought about why he was doing it. 

Neither of them had much growing up, they both came from poor families. Seunghyun himself was always the kind of person who didn’t need much as long as he had a roof over his head and two coins to rub together. He wasn’t greedy. As a teenager he used to make fun of Jiyong when they stole expensive cars and the younger boy would insist it was practice for when they’d both be rich and own 30 sports cars.

He would be lying if he said he wasn’t disappointed as to how his life had turned out. He’d been passively watching himself slip steadily downhill for years. The perfect fall from grace, a model student with a promising future who became.... this. He sometimes wondered what he’d tell his 15 year old self who had decided to run away with his best friend. Then again, maybe he wouldn’t change a thing about his life. Knowing his luck it would end up even worse. He and Jiyong had experienced a lot of fun times together after all.

He felt more sorry for Jiyong than he did for himself. He wasn’t ambitious but Jiyong was the one who had big dreams and big plans. Seunghyun was just content to be along for the ride wherever it took them. He developed a need to just be there and keep his younger friend out of too much trouble and to see him happy. He needed to protect him from himself with his stupid choices and people who either took offence to Jiyong or took advantage of him. He didn’t really care about himself. He had long passed that point. 

Besides, it really was fun for a while, living like outlaws and doing whatever the hell they wanted. Then every day became a grind for survival and the fun days became less frequent. They’d been stealing and selling drugs so they wouldn’t end up sleeping in a bus shelter again. Those were some cold cold nights.

He pushed the bullets into their chambers. 

The consequences for him didn’t matter in the end. He’d do this for his best friend. 

“You look hot with that serious look on your face.” Came a familiar voice. 

“Hmm?” He looked up as Jiyong climbed up onto the bed and settled behind him and placed his hands onto his tense shoulders.

“Want me to loosen these shoulders up for you?” The redhead leaned in to speak into the nape of his neck. 

“You suck at massages. You’re not firm enough so it really just tickles. It’s those girly hands of yours.” Seunghyun teased. 

“You love my hands cos they make your dick look bigger.”

“I don’t need help in that department, thanks.”

“That’s not what I told the girl who was all over you the other night.”

“So THAT’S why she fucked off. You jealous little shit.” His tone was joking. He was more amused than annoyed. 

“She was ugly anyway...” Jiyong purred into Seunghyun‘s ear. She wasn’t ugly though, she had been beautiful. Long glossy hair, ample bust and legs that just seemed to keep going. “I dunno what you see in women anyway.”

“Hmmm, remind me... was that the night you begged on your knees for me to fuck you? I forget...”

“Yes. And you got so fucking hard just seeing it. You love it when I beg, don’t you? You can’t get enough when I let you do whatever you want to me.” He pressed his body closer against Seunghyun's back. “But maybe I was a little outta line. How bout I make it up to you? I can suck you off before we go. That should balance the universe for me cock blocking you.”

Seunghyun almost actually laughed. “Get on the floor. On your knees.”

“Yessir!” The redhead scrambled onto the floor beside the bed, a boxy grin wide on his face. 

“Look at you, you’re practically drooling already.” He sat himself at the edge of the bed and Jiyong shuffled forward to plant himself between his legs, tugging at his friend’s jeans. 

“Its cos I want your cock, Hyung. Please... I wanna taste your cock in my mouth.” He put on a ridiculous begging tone. 

That goddamn mouth. He was already half hard from the words it spilled out.

Seunghyun unbuckled his belt and slid it out from the loops in his jeans, coiling the leather around his own hand as he did so. 

The action of twisting the leather around skin made Jiyong shudder. He loved that belt. He loved it in Seunghyun’s hand and he loved it’s pleasurable bite against his skin. He figured Seunghyun knew exactly how much he loved it because he frequently teased him with the memory of it like this. 

“Not today. That’s for when I can take my time to unravel you.” He dropped the belt onto the floor and unfastened his jeans, slipping them down his thighs with his underwear.

Jiyong was quick to grasp Seunghyun‘s now freed cock, pumping it a few times before sinking his mouth down around it with a groan.

The blond bit the inside of his own cheek to keep himself from moaning. That hot wet mouth around him and the vibrations from him groaning. Every single inch of this man’s body was pure sin and he was addicted to it. He gripped messy red hair tightly those lips slid up and down his shaft.

Seunghyun noticed Jiyong move one of his hands from its place on his thigh. The younger man was palming himself through his jeans. “You’re such a filthy fucking bitch, you’re getting so turned on by sucking me off, aren’t you?”

“Mmmmmhmm.” Jiyong really was a filthy bitch. He was Seunghyun’s filthy bitch. It made him feel validated. He pulled his mouth off briefly with a wet pop. “F-Fuck my mouth” he gasped out, voice sounding ragged and abused. “I wanna feel like your fuck toy.” With that he wrapped his mouth back around Seunghyun’s cock as the man tightened his grip on his hair to hold his head in place. 

“Your mouth is so fucking filthy. Only good for one thing.” He thrust his hips roughly, fucking that perfect face. Jiyong looked so beautiful with his hair sticking to his forehead, a sheen of sweat on his flushed skin and his lips swollen and red around Seunghyun’s dick. 

Jiyong moaned gratuitously as his hand worked his own needy erection free and started stroking himself quickly. He loved feeling so used. Like his was his friend’s favourite plaything, like he was something special.

“Ah fuck Jiyong you look amazing right now but you’re gonna look so much prettier when I cum on your face.” A few more thrusts and Seunghyun jerked Jiyong's head back by his hair.

“Ahh yes Hyung, make me so pretty for you.” Jiyong’s voice came out as an obscene raspy croak as he closed his eyes and put out his tongue, ready to receive. There was no way in hell Jiyong would let himself be so needy and vulnerable with anybody else. This was all just for Seunghyun. The only person who has ever made him feel like he was worth anything. And he fucking craved it. 

That statement alone was almost enough to bring Seunghyun to his climax and it only took a few strokes of himself before he was spilling his seed in hot bursts over the younger man’s flustered face. He groaned deeply as he released and Jiyong licked around his lips in the filthiest way he could muster.

“P-please can I cum for you Hyung?” He begged, hand still working his own shaft with cum dripping down his face. Seunghyun thought it was possibly the most beautiful thing he’d had the pleasure of witnessing. 

“Yeah, you can cum for me.” He bent forward and pulled Jiyong into a rough and messy open mouthed kiss. He didn’t care that he could taste himself there, if anything he found it insanely alluring. “You’re so fucking amazing and you’ll be my downfall.”

Joying kissed back hungrily as he stroked himself into oblivion, accidentally biting down on the older man’s lower lip as his orgasm washed over him. He slumped forward, nuzzling into his chest in the afterglow.

“Sorryyyy...” He looked up with a sickly sweet smile, not sorry at all, and licked Seunghyun’s lower lip where he’d bitten hard enough ti draw blood. 

“You will be. I’ll remember that.” He wiped at his lip with the back of his hand and laughed lightly. He was just glad it was his lip and not anything more tender that got bitten. 

“Better go wash my face.” Jiyong hauled himself up from off the floor and hitched his jeans back up as he meandered out towards the bathroom.

He took a moment to glance at his face in the mirror. He was a mess and it made him laugh a little as he set about cleaning himself up. It made him feel good when people found him attractive enough to ravish him like this.

 

Jiyong would readily admit he wasn’t good at thinking of others. He was capable of being selfish and manipulative without even realising until it was too late. Then he’d feel bad and promise himself he’d take more notice of the feelings of others, but it wouldn’t last long before he slipped back into his selfish ways. He would admit he had pretty bad impulse control. But that’s what he had his best friend for. Maybe he was a little too reliant on that? There was only so much you could lean on a crutch without breaking it. 

What he wouldn’t admit to so easily was how insecure he was. How much he hated himself for letting himself fall so far. How he felt like human garbage most the time. He compensated for his self loathing by dressing in eccentric clothing, acting confident and being the loudest person in the room. The centre of attention. A somebody. Anyone would think he was the most confident man in the world. Sometimes when he was high, drunk or with his best friend he’d almost believe it himself. Fake it ‘til you make it.

 

————

 

They stood outside the abandoned Slaughterhouse. It was starting to rain. Seunghyun thought it was quite nice, it cut through the suffocatingly warm night air nicely. He had just swallowed a propranolol so that his hands wouldn’t shake, he was ready for what was about to happen. 

“You’re ok with this, right?”

“Yep.” 

_‘I’ll switch off my humanity for you, Jiyong.’_

 

Soon, the pair were standing in a dark room. The same one they’d been in before. That felt like a lifetime ago now. The boss standing under the bare lightbulb, smoking a cigar. Behind them, two large men stood blocking the door. There would be no escape if things went wrong.

“I’m sorry Sir... we don’t have your money...” Jiyong was a good liar. Unsettlingly good, as far as Seunghyun was concerned. 

The boss let out a sickening laugh. “I thought as much. Of course two idiots like you couldn’t pull it together. Makes me wonder why I kept you around even this long.” He motioned to the two goons at the door and they both advanced and grabbed Jiyong. 

“What are you doing with him?” Seunghyun thought he better at least say something for effect.

“I’ve got some business partners who are willing to pay me generously for him. Dirty old men just love paying for smartass scrawny boys with pretty faces that they can break. You, on the other hand, are lucky you’re so useless to me. I’m just going to kill you for the trouble you’ve caused me.”

This was it. The moment to act. Jiyong closed his eyes to spare his vision the bloodshed this time. For all the bravado he showed the world he was still just a coward inside.

Seunghyun whipped out the gun he’d tucked into the back of his jeans and aimed it directly into the Boss’ face. The man looked surprised for just a glancing moment. Almost no time passed by before Seunghyun pulled the trigger and shot him through the eye socket. 

Without hesitation he spun around and shot the two goons holding Jiyong before they could react. Both of them went down, one spluttering and gurgling for a few seconds as blood pumped out of his neck. The other was hit in the abdomen and managed to grab his own weapon but lost his grip on it as Seunghyun‘s boot came down heavily on his wrist, pinning it to the floor.

There was a moment when the blond’s eyes met with those of the man bleeding on the floor under his foot. There was a pause, too. A pause which could be seen as almost cruel and maybe even mocking. “Sorry I’m not a better shot...”

Jiyong’s heart was racing, afraid to open his eyes. He didn’t know if it was over or not and when he heard the bang of another gunshot he felt himself recoil from the sound. In his head he was begging for that to have been an end to it. Thankfully it was.

He opened his eyes to the scene in front of him. Three men were now dead and his friend’s hands weren’t shaking this time. That was the first thing he noticed. Then there was that odd blank stare which he saw before. A dark emptiness. Something about it was far more unnerving this time, though. He tried to think what must be going on in Seunghyun’s head because he knew his friend well enough to know that his brain was probably running at the speed of light right now. 

“Come on, Jiyong. I need you to help me carry them.” Seunghyun finally snapped out of his own thoughts. He didn’t look at Jiyong, though. Just spoke to the air between them. 

“R-Right..” he looked between the corpses on the floor. They were people a few seconds ago. Now just lifeless meat wrapped in clothing. Empty shells. Because of them. Something about that thought gnawed at him. This was his idea after all. He didn’t pull the trigger but he may as well have. The panic was rising, gripping at his stomach as his heart thumped in his chest.

“Getting squeamish? You wanted this, remember?” There was something close to anger in Seunghyun‘s voice. His words coming out hard and short. 

“Yeah I know!” He couldn’t pussy out of this now. It was far too late for that. “It’s just.... gross... dead people are gross...” His voice came out small even though he tried to sound more confident than he was. Story of his life, really. 

Seunghyun shot him a sharp look and started dragging one of the bodies out to where the pigs were kept. “I need help getting him over the fence into the pen, Ji!” Maybe he was begging more than he was angry now. 

Jiyong eventually emerged from the back room to face what he had to do. He told himself to man the fuck up and deal with this. He grimaced as he took ahold of the corpse’s feet to help his friend lift it over into the enclosure. The pigs descended on the body instantly. 

“Oh fuck—” Jiyong gagged, turning away quickly. It wasn’t enough, though. Turning away didn’t protect him from the sound. That visceral sound and the noise of the animals grunting and squealing as they ate. It was too much for him and he vomited onto the floor, his stomach churning violently and tears running down his face. 

A firm hand came down on his back. For a second he leaned into it, thinking it was a comforting hand. But it wasn’t. “Suck it up, Jiyong. Two more to go.”

He puked after each body was dumped into the pig pen and retched practically the whole time. There were tears streaming down his cheeks by this and he was shaking violently. He wanted to pull himself together but he couldn’t. Instead, he languished in a headspace somewhere between catatonic and hysteric sobbing. 

_‘What the fuck have we done? What the fuck have I made Seunghyun do?! No wonder he’s been waking up in sweats and popping sedatives like candy. The blood is on HIS hands because of ME. I did this. I did all of this. Now he hates me. Now he’s gonna leave and I’ll be alone. I’ll be nothing!’_

He looked over to Seunghyun for some kind of reassurance, the taller man was standing with his arms folded as looking down at nothing in particular. His face unreadable. 

“I’m s-sorry... I-I—” Jiyong stuttered out his words.

“Let’s just go home.” The blond sounded exhausted.

Jiyong closed his eyes again and hoped for his friend’s comforting embrace. He needed it. Needed those strong arms to encircle him and to feel the warmth of his body heat. He needed it to centre him and make him believe everything was great. But all he got was the sounds of footsteps walking away across the concrete floor.


	6. Confession

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things start turning around for our boys!  
> Jiyong comes clean and Seunghyun starts to feel alive again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys thanks for sticking with this so far!

Jiyong hadn’t spoken to Seunghyun for two days. It made living in the small one bedroom apartment tense and awkward. Jiyong spent as much time as he could outside and would just move around in the evenings. Seunghyun spent his time sleeping and Jiyong noticed his bottle of pills getting closer and closer to being empty. The hypocrite. 

Jiyong walked in one evening and was slightly surprised to see his best friend sitting perched on the couch. 

“We need to talk.” Seunghyun didn’t look over at him.

“Look, I’m so sorry. I’ve fucked up haven’t I? I got us in over out heads, I—“

“No.” He cut him off. It’s fine. I just think if we’re gonna start making money we need to get on it and move our asses. We’ve come this far.”

“Right. Yeah.” Jiyong was a little taken aback. “Sure. Uh, so I can get the merchandise from a contact and we’ll be ready to start selling in a couple of days I think. But... are you ok? You seem kinda like you’re not and I’m worried.” Jiyong didn’t even know if he was ok himself.

“I’m fine. Really. Thank you for your concern.” He finally turned and looked at Jiyong with a hint of a smile, trying to convince the both of them.

 

————

 

Their business venture went very well very quickly. Six months passed by and they were already rolling in money. They were good at what they did. Jiyong was a charismatic salesman and not above using his charm and skills of persuasion. He could probably talk his way out of a room with no doors if he had to. Seunghyun, on the other hand, was a born businessman. He was good with numbers and had a pragmatic brain. They were the ultimate team.

They bought a swanky apartment in the expensive part of town as soon as they could afford it. They made deals with bent cops to keep them off their backs. They partied, Jiyong mostly sticking to his word by not sampling their own merchandise. Seunghyun had been trying to teach Jiyong how to handle a weapon in case he ever had to defend himself because with status came danger. Jiyong didn’t take it that seriously, though. He was high on the success again. He was fucking untouchable. He was bulletproof. Unkillable. Nobody was gonna pull him down from his pedestal. He was floating on delusions of grandeur, the expensive luxuries and people kissing his ass only serving to feed that feeling.

Even Seunghyun got caught up in the lifestyle. He quickly developing a taste for very expensive wines and whiskies. He dressed sharply in designer suits, finally giving into his friend nagging him about buying some new clothes. He liked the way they looked on him and the way it gave him an air of dominance. He liked walking into a room and hearing it fall quiet and he liked it when people sucked up to him. Above all he liked seeing Jiyong happy. They laughed together like idiots and things were fun again. It was like they were both finally living in the light after crawling out of the sewer and he was going to enjoy every second of it before the fall came. Because all good things come to an end, right? 

“Oh my God, what the actual fuck are you wearing? You look like you fell through a load of laundry and came out wearing half of it. This is actually worse than that skirt thing you wore last week.” Seunghyun tried to look disapproving at his friend’s offensively eclectic outfit but a laugh slipped out. Jiyong stood in red shoes with a slight heel, purple skinny jeans, a leopard print shirt which was so tight it could have been spray painted onto him and a faux fur shrug.

“I can look good in anything. I could wear a garbage bag and still look good. You’ve said so yourself.” He poked his tongue out a little, playfully. “Besides, it’s all designer.”

“That doesn’t make it alright. You’d be better off in the garbage bag.” He let himself laugh this time.

“Yeah well I think I look great.” He did a flamboyant twirl on the spot.

“The single earring is a bit much though.”

“I was wearing two earrings but Coco Chanel says take off the last accessory you put on.” Jiyong quipped.

“I’m not sure that’s quite what that means, Jiyong.” He rolled his eyes. 

“Call me...” He dramatically put on a pair of large framed sunglasses. “G Dragon.”

”I am not calling you that. Ever.”

“I bet I’ll get you to call me that one day.”

 

The pair headed to a nightclub they’d bought three months prior as a way to launder the money they were making. It had also turned out to be a good investment. It was the kind of place people went when they had more money than sense or wanted to really impress someone. Slick and modern with overpriced drinks. A million miles from the dirty clubs with damp sticky walls they’d been used to themselves. 

They perched in the VIP area where a select few people were allowed. Those who paid the extortionate fee and the especially attractive young women who were offered a pass at the door. That had been Jiyong’s idea but it was something he quickly came to regret.

He may have been full of inflated self confidence but Jiyong did still have one particular insecurity. The money and status was making Seunghyun especially popular with these beautiful young females. Who wouldn’t want to take a pass at a rich, successful and ridiculously handsome man in an Armani suit? Jiyong could more than compete with any man who tried it on with Seunghyun but women were different. They had something he didn’t.

When a buxom young brunette sat perched in Seunghyun‘s lap, his hand on her bare upper thigh as she toyed with his shirt buttons, Jiyong saw red. He’d ignored it for a while but eventually had enough as his jealousy reached its tipping point. His brain was buzzing on the high of his sense of entitlement and his already weak self control was further dulled with alcohol. He made his way over just as Seunghyun stared kissing her neck and chest.

“Hey there Honey, it’s time for you to go now. While I’m still feeling generous and all that.” Jiyong slurred. The woman scoffed and didn’t budge. She just attached her lips to Seunghyun’s. Jiyong wasn’t having any of it and he pulled her up off his lap by her hair. 

“Jiyong. what the hell is wrong with you?” Seunghyun tried not to raise his voice too much and set the redhead off even more. He knew all to well how volatile he could be.

“Don’t know if you noticed, Hyung, but this bitch was sitting in my seat.” He let her go and she recoiled from him. Part of him was disappointed she wasn’t crying.

Something about that really pissed Seunghyun off. “Last time I checked I wasn’t your fucking property.” The taller man got up and stepped into Jiyong’s personal space, crowding him before leaning down so that their faces were close. He lowered his voice but kept it in a tight tone. “And nobody likes a fucking brat.” That hurt. That really hurt. He could see it in Jiyong’s eyes and he’d meant for it to hurt, too. 

There was just something about the venom he’d spat those words out with. Jiyong physically drew himself back as if the words had caused him physical pain. He looked like he may say something for a moment but instead he stalked off out of the club before he could hear or say anything else. This was one of the few rimes Jiyong knew to back down.

 

—————

 

It was about 10am the next day when Jiyong staggered in through the door of the flashy apartment. 

“What the fuck have you been doing all night?” Came a stern voice. 

Jiyong squinted as he looked over at his friend, too drunk to focus his eyes properly. “I was out having fun while you were fucking that stupid whore. Hope she put a smile on your face, would make a change from the grumpy asshole you are sometimes. One minute you’re laughing and the next you’re all sullen, nothing makes you fucking happy. Sitting around in your designer suits sipping expensive booze with a cigar like you’re some kind of Bond villain as you chew on sedatives. Tell me, did you make them titties bounce? Make her scream your name? Was her pussy nice and tight? Did she let you—” He would have kept going but there was a sudden sharp sting across half his face. Seunghyun had slapped him. Hard. Hard enough it brought tears to Jiyong’s eyes even with the alcohol dulling his sensations. 

“The fuck is wrong with you? You’re so fucking selfish! I do everything I can for you and you just turn into a brat when something doesn’t go your way. I can do whatever I like. It’s not like we’re boyfriends!”

“You are to me! In my stupid head you are! I know I’m a brat! I know we just got the friends with benefits thing going on but for me it ain’t like that! It hasn’t been like that for so fucking long. I can’t even sleep around with other people anymore! I fucking love you!” There were full tears now. 

Seunghyun paused for a moment with an unreadable expression and rubbed his temples. “You’re a fucking mess. Take a cold shower and go to bed. You need to sober up.”

The fact he didn’t even seem to register the confession was like a punch to the gut to Jiyong. He just hung his head and did as instructed. When he climbed into the shower he couldn’t even feel the cold water on his body. All he could feel was how much his heart hurt, he just wanted to cry until time turned itself back.

Despite his emotional pain, sleep came to him quickly when his he eventually crawled into bed. Though it was more just passing out than sleeping. 

Seunghyun just let him be for the rest of the day, intermittently checking he hadn’t choked on his own vomit or something. He felt bad about hitting him and he felt even worse for basically snubbing his confession. He’d never seen so much hurt in his friend’s eyes before. After most of the day passed by he went into the bedroom to gently prod Jiyong awake after setting down a glass of water for him. “I’m sorry...” 

“You don’t need to be... I was an ass.” Jiyong mumbled meekly as he buried his face into the pillow, remembering his confession. 

“.... I didn’t fuck her. Just so you know.”

“You don’t have to justify things to me. Like you said, you’re not mine. We aren’t boyfriends. You can do whatever, whoever, you like.” He sniffled.

Seunghyun rubbed his back soothingly. “That’s what you were gonna say when we were locked in that freezer, right? That you felt this way?”

Jiyong nodded into the pillow. Too ashamed to look up. 

“Yeah... thought so. That’s why I stopped you.”

Jiyong braced himself. Here it comes. Seunghyun was about to give the knife in his heart a final twist. 

“Because I didn’t want to hear it like that... if it was you feeling like you had to say it because it was your last chance. I.... I wanted to hear it from you naturally.”

This time he did look up from the pillow. “I’m not sure I understand what you’re saying.”

“I’ve had feelings for you for a long time. Probably on some level since we met when we were kids, actually. I remember thinking you were super cool at first. Then I found out how painfully uncool you were capable of being and it made me wanna be around you even more. Had such a stupid crush on you. I suppose that developed into something more over time. There’s almost nothing I wouldn’t do for you, Jiyong. I love you deeply and that’s not something I’ve ever felt towards another person before.”

“Really? Please tell me you aren’t just saying that to spare my feelings.”

“I’m not saying it to spare your feelings. I love you. Even though you’re a total weirdo. But hey so am I.” He kissed Jiyong’s forehead. “But I’m not kissing you properly until you’ve brushed your teeth.” 

Before he could pull away Jiyong reached up and pulled him down closer into an embrace. He buried his face into Seunghyun’s neck.

“Drink some water, I’ll bring you some aspirin and toast. We can have a proper talk about what this means when you feel less like crap.”

Jiyong nodded. He wanted to be his and only his.


	7. Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys head to Busan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry this was so late! I’ve been in the hospital with a blood clot in my lung, ugh! Please forgive me for the delay :(

Once Jiyong’s head had fully cleared from the night of alcohol, he made his way out to the living room. Seunghyun was sat reading the newspaper, his glasses slipping down his nose. Jiyong loved his glasses and the sight made him lick his lips. One day he would pluck up the courage to ask the man to keep them on during sex.

“You meant what you said, right?” Jiyong uttered cautiously. 

“Of course.” He looked up and put the paper aside, pushing his glasses back up. “Did you?”

“I wanna be yours. Only yours. I want you to be mine, too. I don’t want anybody else and I don’t want you to want anybody else.”

“I don’t need anybody else, Jiyong.”

Jiyong smiled in a boxy grin and practically did a run and jump onto the other man’s lap. “Why are we so stupid? Why did we wait this long?”

“Guess we're both just pussies. Too gutless to say what we feel.”

“Well then I’ll say it now. Be my boyfriend. You honestly dunno how much I’ve wanted to call you that.” He hurried his face in Seunghyun’s neck. 

“Call me whatever you want if it’ll make you happy. Ji.”

“And you can call me G Dragon!”

“Not this again. No way.” He rolled his eyes and gently shoved the grinning redhead off his lap.

 

——————

 

The pair had to travel to Busan to meet up with a potential client in order to discuss the import of an especially large shipment of cocaine. This was too important to leave up to a lackey. They had decided to go out to the city a few days ahead of time. They hadn’t really had the chance to have much leisure time while business was so good and Busan was somewhere they’d both wanted to visit. 

They stayed in an expensive hotel overlooking the beach. The windows were huge and had the perfect view of the sun setting over the ocean. Most people would appreciate the simple beauty of a sunset, but the first thought Jiyong had when he laid eyes on the panoramic window was a fantasy about getting fucked against it.

They’d been there a day when Seunghyun walked out of the bathroom to see the redhead standing in the middle of the room. 

“Wadda you think?” Jiyong twirled around, he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt. A flamboyantly loud looking one at that. 

“I can’t decide if you look like a creepy uncle or a fuckboy.”

“Aw you flatter me soooo much.” Jiyong laughed and thrust an equally offensively coloured piece of fabric at Seunghyun. “I got you one, too! We can match!”

“You’re crazy if you think I’m gonna wear this thing. For one thing it’s hideous. For another I refuse to let us be one of those couples who wear matching outfits.” He looked at the shirt like it was some kind of toxic sewer rag.

“Oh come on, don’t be a grumpy old man...” Jiyong pushed out his lower lip in a pout. “It’ll make me happy if you wear it!”

Seunghyun rolled his eyes and sighed in defeat. “Fine.”

“Now. Put it on now. I wanna see it!”

“For fuck sake. You’re like a little kid.” He slowly unbuttoned his crisp white shirt, watching Jiyong lick his lips as he did so. He slipped the fabric off his shoulders a little slower than required, teasing, before putting on the Hawaiian shirt. “Is Jiyong a happy boy now?”

“Actually no. I changed my mind. Can you just wear nothing at all? Like ever?” He swore the man got hotter every time he looked at him and it made him practically salivate. 

“Nope. Never letting you see me naked again now.” He threw the white shirt in the redhead’s face as he walked past him. “Let’s go! Got sights to see!” He called over his shoulder. 

They wandered the city, seeing the sights. They visited Haedong Yonggungsa temple, the aquarium, and Gamcheon. It was nice. Like they were just normal people. It had been so long since they’d felt normal, if ever. 

By the evening, the two men sat out on the sand, watching the sun set over the horizon as it burned deep orange in the sky and reflected off the ocean. There was a chill in the air and a salty breeze. Jiyong was sat in Seunghyun’s lap with his back resting against his chest and Seunghyun intermittently pressed his lips against the side of the redhead’s neck. 

“I see now why you wanted to sit out here. Totally worth the view even though I’m probably gonna have sand in my butt crack or something now.” Jiyong broke the peaceful silence.

“I like the ocean. It’s a whole other world we can’t be a part of. I’d love to spent even a day being able to live in the ocean. To be able to just float with the cool water embraced around my whole body and to swim freely. Even the thought of the deep heavy water at the ocean floor pressing in around me is actually kinda comforting, in a weird way.”

“Under tha sea. Under tha sea. Darling it's better, down where it's wetter. Take it from meeeee!” Jiyong started to sing and the taller man laughed.

“You’re the one with red hair, Ariel.”

“I’d rather be a bird. I know it’s cliché but I’d love to be able to fly. I wanna be a sea eagle. That way I can still be near you if you’re a fish.”

“If anybody would fly too close to the sun it’d be you, though.”

“True, so maybe it’s just as well we’re stuck here as boring ol land mammals. I think it’d be worth it, though. If burning up into oblivion was the price to pay for a brief moment of being totally free in the sky... I’d take it. Every time.” He didn’t really register the significance of his words with himself. Didn’t even notice the slight stiffening of the other man’s posture behind him.

“I know you would.” That’s what worried him. Jiyong was the kind of person who spent his life searching for happiness and new highs which took him ever closer to the edge. Sometimes he even doubted he could really make the younger man truly happy. 

“Suits you to be in the ocean, though. It’s dark and deep. Like you. And I imagine it’s an attractive prospect for you to relinquish yourself to the crushing depths.”

Seunghyun looked at him again. Jiyong was clearly more perceptive than he gave him credit for. “No crushing depths while I got you, I promise.”

“And no burning up in the sun while I got you around.” Jiyong had every intention of believing himself.

Seunghyun leaned his chin on the smaller man’s shoulder. They sat together silently again, watching the sun slowly disappear. Almost an hour passed before Seunghyun figured it was probably time they headed inside since it probably wasn’t too safe to be on the beach in the dark as the tide was coming in. 

“C’mon lets go back to the hotel.” He murmured to the other man who was leaning heavily against him. There was no response though. He listened closely and heard slow steady breaths. Jiyong has fallen asleep. He turned the smaller man in his lap so that he could stand while holding him bridal style. He almost fell over in the process, legs numb from sitting and unsteady on the sand. 

Jiyong didn’t wake up at all as Seunghyun carried him all the way to the hotel room and laid him on the bed. He carefully extracted him from most of his clothes and pulled the blankets up. 

“I wish I could sleep like that.” He muttered to himself as he looked over the man’s peacefully sleeping face. It made his heart flutter and ache, he had so much love for him that he didn’t know what to do with it. He wanted to take the time to kiss over every single inch of skin on his body, to taste all of him at once. But no, for now he would let Jiyong sleep. He undressed himself and slipped into bed next to him where he laced their fingers together, feeling especially in need of at least some physical contact to the beautiful creature beside him.

Seunghyun fell asleep without taking any sedatives. This was both good and bad. Good he wasn’t so dependant on them but the sedatives would at least give him an empty dreamless sleep. Without them he was prone to nightmares. These nightmares came in two forms. Either they would be twistingly visceral and vivid or they would be bizarre, unsettling and abstract. 

Tonight his mind took him somewhere between the two.

_There was a vast expanse of barren land, the earth cracked and dry. From the scorched dead ground there were hands reaching up through the parched soil. Withered hands with gnarled fingers the size of trees reaching up to the blazing sun, stretching and grasping in anguish.  
From in each palm there was what appeared to be a body wrapped in white shrouds with blood seeping through the tightly bound fabric fabric. _

_He stepped closer to one which was reachable and tugged on the shroud and watched as it fell away easily. The corpse underneath had an amused and mocking gaze set on it and it’s face looked oddly familiar. Like the first man he had killed. He jumped back, startled, and when he looked to the three bodies next to it he saw that they had also lost their shrouds. They were his other victims. All with their faces contorted into spiteful smirks._

_He took several steps back until something grabbed at his ankles. He looked down and saw hands grasping at his legs from the ground. He tried to pull away but they were pulling him down and there was the sound of wicked laughing over a desperate scream. He was panicking and struggling, trying to get free and then—_

“Seunghyun?!” 

—Suddenly he was face to face with Jiyong. But it was a face he didn’t recognise for a moment and he pushed the smaller man away from him forcefully. The redhead almost fell off the bed and before he could utter anything other than a surprised yelp there were hands wrapped around his throat. 

Seunghyun was stuck in fight or flight, not quite sure what was dream and what was reality. His strong grip easily cut off Jiyong’s ability to breathe but the younger man forced himself to not struggle. He knew fighting wouldn’t help and would probably get him hurt. He let his body go limp except for his hand coming up to gently run through Seunghyun’s hair, as though to say everything was ok. Even though inside Jiyong was panicking, his own heartbeat thundering in his ears. 

A few seconds passed by and the blond released his grip, just as Jiyong’s vision was starting to blacken. Realisation seemed to flood Seunghyun’s expression and he withdrew away sharply as though he’d touched a hot surface. 

“Oh my God I’m s-so sorry! Not again! I’m so sorry I don’t know what I— I don’t know what I was doing. There were bodies! H-Hands! Grabbing at me. Screaming and laughing. That smirk. F-fuck! Those faces!”

“No no it’s alright. You didn’t hurt me and everything is fine. You’re here with me in the hotel in Busan and you’re safe.” His voice was croaky and he was still trying to catch his breath. 

“I thought we agreed you wouldn’t wake me when I had nightmares!”  
“We did but you looked so afraid I couldn’t leave you to suffer...”

“I could have really fucking hurt you, Ji....” he looked down at his hands. 

“But you didn’t.” Jiyong encircled his arms around the taller man and pulled him into a tight hug. “I’m here and I love you and nothing it’s ok...”

“Jiyong...” he relaxed into the embrace, nuzzling into his neck for comfort. “I love you so fucking much. I’m sorry for hurting you.”

“Hardly felt a thing.” Jiyong gently pulled him down to lay back on the bed next to him.

They stayed awake the rest of the night, just humming and murmuring in each other’s arms.

Sometimes Jiyong had to be the strong one. The one giving comfort. And he was ok with that, he could at least repay Seunghyun in kind. He owed the man at least that much


	8. Sunrise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe things are going just a little too well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slow update again I’m sorry. Wanted to get it finished sooner but I’ve not been recovering as well as I’d have liked to. Thank you for your continued support!

The pair had watched the sun rise out the window from their bed in the hotel room. Neither of them had slept after Seunghyun had woken from his nightmare. But they were calm now. Laying there half propped up on the pillows in each other’s arms as the darkness gave way to the sun. In the light, though, Seunghyun could see a bruises starting to form across Jiyong’s throat. A pang of intense guilt hit him in the stomach. There had been a number of times he had punched, pushed or kicked Jiyong either during a night terror or when the younger man had woken him from one. This was different, this could have been so much worse.

“Shit... look at you...”

“Hmm?” Jiyong looked puzzled for a moment and then realised what he must mean. He brought his own hand to where his neck felt tender. It hurt anyway but hurt even more to touch. He didn’t wince, though. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t know what I was—”

“I don’t want to hear you apologise again. It’s fine, it doesn’t even hurt. I knew you weren’t gonna actually really hurt me.” Jiyong cut him off with two lies. It did hurt and even his voice sounded rough and bruised. Further more he’d actually thought Seunghyun might choke the life right out of him at the time. He had been able to feel his cricoid cartilage crunching and bending under the pressure.

“Doesn’t stop me being sorry.”

“Oh shut the fuck up, will ya? It’s not exactly the first time you’ve choked me in bed.” Jiyong nudged him playfully, trying to lift the mood with a joke. 

“Yes but I’m in control then, that’s the point.”

Jiyong shrugged nonchalantly. “Whatever. I’m over it, you should be too. Go shower or something, you were sweating bullets half the night. It’s gross.” He poked his tongue out cheekily. He was a good actor, fully able to hide how much the experience had shaken him. The last thing he wanted was for Seunghyun to feel guilty.

“Fine.” The blond dragged himself out of bed and into the bathroom.

As soon as the door clicked closed, Jiyong got up from the bed to look in the mirror so he could look at his neck. The bruises were going to be nasty when they were fully bloomed. He cringed at his reflection and turned away to rummage in his bag for some aspirin and a couple of codeine. He grabbed a bottle of water from the mini fridge and took an experimental sip. Fuck, it hurt to swallow. He took one of the codeine pills first, since they were smaller, followed by another. He could feel the little pills scrape their way down his throat. Finally he practically stared down the larger aspirin for a few seconds before throwing it to the back of his mouth and following it with a gulp of water. He coughed and choked on it, spitting some of the water down his t-shirt, even inhaling some of it which made him splutter and cough even more. The coughing hurt the most and it brought tears to his eyes. Eventually he got the pill down. 

He took some slow deep breaths and told himself to suck it up and get over it. Today was a big day. Today they were meeting their import contact. It was make or break. If it went well they’d go from being big fish in a small pond to being big fish in a lake. Jiyong liked the sound of that. 

He looked back into the mirror. This time he was studying his own face. He looked healthier these days, no dark circles under his eyes and a healthy warm glow to his skin. His cleaner lifestyle and ability to eat proper meals had been good for him. Not just his face, his body didn’t ache like it used to and his bones poked out a whole lot less. He felt happier, too. Life wasn’t a constant uphill battle anymore.

When Seunghyun returned from the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist loosely, Jiyong waltzed over and loosely draped his arms around the other man’s shoulders. “Is it ok if I call you my boyfriend? Been meaning to ask ever since we stopped being idiots.” It had played on his mind for a while. What exactly where they now? They’d moved from friends with benefits to whatever they were now so easily.

“Uh... I guess? That sounds kinda weird though? Maybe? Boyfriend makes me feel like a 16 year old kid who just started dating.”

“So what then?”

“Call me whatever you like does it really matter?”

“You’re right. But still. Hmm maybe you should propose so I can call you my fiancé, hmmm?”

“Psh. Don’t get ahead of yourself now, Kwon.”

Jiyong laughed but maybe part of him would have liked a somewhat softer response. “I’ll hold off on buying my white dress then, huh?” He joked as he slinked into the bathroom, grabbing a plastic bag from the table on his way and closing the door behind him. 

Seunghyun began getting dressed into a suit he’d selected specifically for this meeting. Small print black and white checks. Business appropriate but not boring. Just enough personality to say he was confident but not cocky. He supposed Jiyong would be wearing something over the top and flashy so he didn’t want them to look too headache inducing together, either. By the time he was dressed and messed around with his hair he realised that Jiyong still hadn’t come back from the bathroom. 

He could hear the shower still running. It had been almost an hour and even Jiyong didn’t usually spend that long in the shower. He made his way over to the door and knocked. 

“You better hurry up, we can kiss our asses goodbye if we’re late.”

There was no response, just the continued sound of running water. He knocked again. Paranoia started to creep into his head. “I’m coming in and I’ll kill you if this door is locked.” He tried the handle, fortunately it wasn’t locked. He opened it and there was a moment of sudden panic which shot through him like a bolt of lightning because of what he saw in there. There was a towel stained with red laying in the sink and another equally stained towel on the floor. 

But all fear subsided as quickly as it had arrived as soon as he saw the box of red hair dye on the side of the sink. The shower switched off and Jiyong stepped out and looked at him with a raised eyebrow. 

“You ok?” Jiyong picked up another towel and rubbed it through his now vibrant red locks, though his hair was still dark at the roots.

Seunghyun realised he was still wearing his shocked and concerned expression. “No. Yeah. I’m fine. Just thought you’d slipped in the shower and smashed your skull to pieces on the tiles.”

“Sorry to disappoint. Just thought I’d freshen up my colour a little, gonna need you to bleach my roots for me again sometime.” 

“I will, but don’t come crying to me when your hair falls out cos you don’t condition it properly.” He shrugged and left Jiyong to get ready. 

To his surprise the younger man’s outfit wasn’t actually too garish. All black except for a leopard print blazer. He looked pretty damn good. Then again, Seunghyun was pretty sure that Jiyong would in fact look amazing in literally anything. 

Before leaving, Seunghyun toyed with the idea of wearing his glasses or not and pretended not to notice Jiyong rolling his eyes at his new found vanity. He decided against the glasses and the duo headed to meet with their contact. This was really make or break for them, the potential to enter the big leagues was in the balance. Whether they were ready or not. They were currently doing well for themselves so it was of course a risky venture. 

 

The man they met was shifty to say the least. They expected that. Hell, they were probably pretty shifty themselves to any outside observer. He was a short potbellied man with thinning hair brushed awkwardly over a bald patch. He was dripping in expensive chains and big gold rings and a cigar between his lips. He also had a creepy sleepy air about him, especially in the way he looked Jiyong up and down like a piece of meat. Despite the fact they were there to get on this man’s good side, Seunghyun had placed an arm possessively around Jiyong throughout the meeting. As if to say Jiyong belonged to him and that nobody else could so much as glance at him. 

In spite of that, it apparently went well. The guy seemed to like them and agreed to the shipment coming into Busan the following Friday night where it would then be transported to Seoul before being sent out across the country. He had assured them that for a small fee he would take care of the logistics, bribing the right cops and port authorities to turn a blind eye. An offer they took because they knew Seoul’s underbelly well and filling it with cocaine was one thing but it was quite another to go country-wide. They were inexperienced in that respect. 

Maybe they were even ignorant?

 

With the tension of the meeting released and the day drawing to a close it was time to celebrate their success. They were moving up in the world again, the sky was the limit. They were unstoppable. They ordered the most expensive champagne from the hotel room service. Prior to developing his taste for outrageously expensive alcohol Seunghyun would have been practically offended at the price. But now he was worth it. Jiyong was worth it. They were both worth it. They deserved it. Nice things and the opportunity to spend gratuitous amounts of money on pointless things. Just because they could. They weren’t struggling for survival or living hand to mouth anymore. 

By the time the bottle arrived they were all hands and lips. Kissing and touching and stripping off each other’s clothes to reach bare flesh. Seunghyun pushed Jiyong down onto the bed and followed him, straddling his narrow hips and leaning over him. He popped the cork on the champagne bottle with a sharp bang as the bottle expelled the cold wet foam over Jiyong’s bare torso. He gave a breathy gasp as the coldness hit his overheated skin. Seunghyun leaned down and licked long slow stripes over the younger man’s belly, tongue dipping into where the champagne had pooled in his belly button.

“Tastes much better like this.” Seunghyun’s voice came out as a low rumble which made Jiyong almost quiver. 

“Mmhh gonna share it?” 

“Sit up, tilt your head back and open your mouth.” There was that commanding tone that Jiyong loved so much. He sat up on his haunches and tilted his head back, eyes closed and mouth open and waiting as instructed. 

Steadily, Seunghyun placed his free hand on the small of his back. He held the bottle above Jiyong and dribbled the expensive alcoholic liquid into his waiting mouth and watched how he drank it eagerly. Very time he closed his mouth to swallow, the still running champagne would run over his face and trickle down his body. The cold and the tingle of the fizz caused goosebumps to raise across the expanse of skin. The sight was beautiful. Perfect in every way. 

“You look so tempting right now, Jiyong. I could lick champagne off every inch of your body.” He stopped pouring and brought the bottle to his own lips, taking two big gulps before setting it down on the bedside table. “You’re so beautiful...”

“And you’re hot as fuck.” Jiyong reached out and brought his hand up into blond hair, catching the alcohol flavoured lips into a kiss and pressing their naked bodies flush together.

Seunghyun’s hands found themselves trailing down a familiar path from the redhead’s upper back, sweeping across to his side and down along the curvature of his waist and hips before coming to rest on the back of his thigh. “I love you, Ji.” He brought one hand up to Jiyong’s jaw and angled his head just right to deepen the kiss, thumb resting below his lower lip. 

Jiyong could practically feel his heart skipping beats in his chest. He couldn’t get enough of hearing those simple words. “I love you, too.” He rolled their hips together, the friction against his erection causing him to moan into the kiss. He was starting to get needy, especially when Seunghyun started kissing down over the bruises on his throat. It was still sore and the bruises had darkened and spread through the day. The pressure of lips against the marred flesh brought about an addictive kind of pain. He didn’t even notice himself grinding against his lover’s thigh until—

“You gonna get yourself off by humping my leg like a dog?” 

Jiyong blushed. He actually blushed. He could feel it burning in his own face. Usually he was so shameless that it surprised even himself. “Fuck me. B-But fuck me slow. Please Hyung.” He pulled himself away from the warm body contact and laid himself back down on the bed and spread himself out. He loved rough quick sex but sometimes he wanted more. Something tender. His heart felt like it was trying to break out of his chest. For some reason he felt so much more bare and vulnerable when they were like this. He enjoyed the feeling. 

“Whatever my Jiyong wants.” He took a moment to rake his eyes over the body laying splayed out in front of him. 

They were slow and tender but maybe not quite gentle. Seunghyun took his time kissing over Jiyong’s smooth skin, his soft curves and sharp angles. He only broke their contact to grab a bottle of lube so that he could start fingering the younger man open. He took more time over building up to three fingers than he needed to. He just loved how Jiyong writhed and rocked his hips in need below him and the way he clenched around his fingers. He was addicted to everything about him and it was hard to maintain his composure and control in these kinds of intimate moments. He just had the need to be close to this man and part of him desperately wished he could be so close that they’d become the same person.

“Want you now...” That breathless and imploring voice. 

“You don’t know how much I love you...”

“I dunno I think I’ve got a pretty good idea.”

“Without you I have nothing to live for.”

“You’re my world. You always have been. Now shut the fuck up and take me.” Of course Jiyong didn’t have the patience to go through with the slow experience. 

Seunghyun crooked his fingers against Jiyong’s prostate, making him jolt in surprise, before withdrawing them entirely. The needy whimper Jiyong made at the emptiness left behind only spurred him on. He hitched his legs up around his waist easily and glanced over him again before sliding his achingly hard cock into Jiyong’s waiting hole. Moving at a torturously slow pace even though he desperately wanted to just take him, to fuck him into the bed. Because he also wanted to tease. More than that, though, he wanted to draw these moments out. His heart thrummed away in his chest, his pulse bounding against his eardrums as he watched Jiyong tense and relax until he was all the way inside. 

“Move already. Please! Need it so fucking bad...” Jiyong moaned out. 

“What happened to slow?” After that he didn’t waste time in starting up a steady rhythm, fucking him slow and deep. 

Their bodies rolled together in perfect synchrony as breathy moans filled the room. Seunghyun knew Jiyong’s body better than even his own and he knew exactly what angle he needed to be at to hit the right spot inside the smaller man. 

 

“S-So good... ahhh! God what d-did I do to deserve you?” Jiyong choked out his words as he lazily stroked himself in time with each thrust. Sweat started to gather on his skin, making him almost glitter in the soft light of the lamp, accentuating the way his body was angled with the arching of his back. When he craned his neck back, exposing his bruised throat, Seunghyun leaned down and kissed over it again so tenderly and apologetically. It made the younger man groan and the vibrations of his voice resonated through Seunghyun’s lips. 

“You’re so beautiful, Jiyong. Cum for me...” He sucked gently at the base of his throat and gave an extra hard thrust up against his prostate. 

The redhead moaned some unintelligible words and pumped himself more feverishly. The familiar heat was coiling in the pit of his stomach and he could feel his body starting to tighten up. A few more thrusts into his sweet spot and strokes of his cock had him spiralling off the edge, spilling his seed all over his own abdomen. 

Seunghyun made sure to draw out the younger’s orgasm by fucking him through it, hitting that tender place deep inside. He could feel Jiyong’s body contort in pleasure, a feeling he could never get bored of. That feeling mixed with the shameless sounds coming from the other man’s mouth sent him over the edge, too. He shot his load while buried deep inside Jiyong, filling him up just the way Jiyong liked it.

“Ohh fuck I love when you c-cum in me,” Jiyong shivered and shifted his hips as he came down from the pleasure high. “Don’t pull out just yet.”

“Whore.” Seunghyun teased, a gentle grin on his face. It had been a long 24 hours and he was exhausted, his arms trembling slightly as he struggled ho hold himself up over Jiyong. He gave it a couple of seconds, looking down at him catching his breath. Soon he pulled out and let himself collapse onto the bed, laying half on top of Jiyong. 

The sound of breathing was all that filled the room for a while. Each of them content in the moment with the object of their lust and love pressed against them.

“We need to clean up...” Seunghyun murmured.

“No we don’t, let’s just sleep.”

“We’re gross. You’ll regret it in the morning when we’re stuck together with champagne, sweat and semen.”

“No I won’t.”

And that was that. They fell asleep in that same position with Seunghyun drifting into a comfortable dreamless slumber


	9. Numbers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys return from Busan and find something has happened while they were away.
> 
> Violence in this chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been feeling much better over the last couple of days and been sent home so I’ve been able to work on the latest chapter! Here it is!

Jiyong had wanted to stay in Busan for longer and convinced his partner they should stay the week and oversee the shipment coming in before flying back to Seoul. They’d been working hard and the relaxation was a welcome break. They’d watch the sun set on the beach every night. Jiyong has tried a couple of times to convince Seunghyun to live out a beach sex fantasy but the blond was having none of it. He’d explain that sand and sex really didn’t mix and that he didn’t want it in intimate crevices. 

Upon their return to Seoul, Seunghyun went straight to review the records he insisted on keeping. He knew keeping a record of their business was risky because it was potential evidence for the authorities. He wanted to know where exactly money and product was going, though. Wanted to keep a close eye on everything and make sure all the numbers balanced out. This was a business, after all. He had decided it was safest to keep hand written records because he had a distrust of computers. Computer files could be copied and duplicated and corrupted without him even noticing. Paper could be burned and once ledgers were full and the numbers double checked that’s exactly what he’d do. Numbers on a page couldn’t be recovered from a pile of ashes, after all. 

While they were away he had given a blank ledger to the man they had left in charge of overseeing operations. The man, Uji had been a part of the supply scene in Seoul since he’d fled the Yakuza in Japan 10 years prior. He knew what he was doing and he was somebody they’d kept around from when they’d taken over the operation. He’d always seemed like a level headed guy. Someone who could be trusted. Not too greedy or ambitious, he seemed to know his place. 

He slipped on his glasses and sat at his desk in the office of their apartment, lighting up a cigarette as he began to look through the pages. He audibly scoffed because the handwriting was untidy and the numbers messily scrawled down. He thanked the gods he’d given the man a separate ledger, not letting him ruin the aesthetics of his own well kept records. Seunghyun liked things to be a certain way. 

Jiyong left him alone for a while, knowing better than to distract him too much. He found things like that incredibly dull, anyway. In fact he would probably lose the will to live if Seunghyun ever explained his accounting system to him again. 

Eventually he got a little bored and slipped into the office and placed a mug of coffee down on the desk.

“You’re frowning. You’ll give yourself wrinkles.” Jiyong said before kissing Seunghyun’s cheek with a smile.

“Hm? Oh yeah sorry. This is just a mess. I keep having to go over it. Some of the notes are in Kanji for fuck sake.” He rolled his eyes and sat back in the chair a little. “His Hangul is so bad it’s almost easier to read the Kanji.” 

“Well... if you used a spreadsheet instead you wouldn’t have this problem.” He placed a hand on his shoulder, leaning over slightly to look at the pages. 

“You know I don—”

“Don’t trust computers. I know.” Jiyong cut him off. “Now drink your coffee.” The gentle smile didn’t leave his lips until he started laughing to himself.

“Gonna share the joke?” Seunghyun leaned his head ball so he was looking up at him.

“Was just thinking, when did we become so domestic?” He braced his hands a little more firmly onto broad shoulders as he looked down into Seunghyun’s eyes. The reversal of their height difference was quite the novelty and it wasn’t lost on either of them. Jiyong kind of liked looking down over him. 

“Probably when you became such a good wife without drugs fucking up your freaky little brain.” It was true. Jiyong had become far less impulsive and far less prone to flying off the handle. He felt better, too. Happier. Calmer. Like there was less chaos inside his head. He still had his moments, of course, but it less frequent and less explosive. 

“Why am I the wife?” He gave an over exaggerated pout. 

“You just are. You definitely are.” He grinned up at the younger man.

“I’m not making you coffee again. Ever.” Jiyong leaned down and kissed him, the upside down angle a little awkward but they made it work with subtle shifts in angles. 

“I’m sorry... I really need to get back to work.” Seunghyun broke off the kiss. 

“Fine I’ll leave you be. Don’t drown anymore, though.” He left the room as the blond man sipped his coffee end went back to tapping away on his calculator. 

Another hour and a half passed and Jiyong was scrolling through some online shopping while sprawled out on the large comfy couch. He was singing along under his breath to the music he had playing in the background. He’d stripped off to his boxers, bare feet and a white tshirt that was so big for him it ended half way down his thighs. He clicked over to the beauty products and laughed to himself when he thought how Seunghyun would react to him buying him some anti-aging face masks. He imagined he’d probably throw them at him and a few days later he’d get self conscious about it and use them but not admit to it. 

“Jiyong can you come in here please?”

He rolled off the couch and made his way to the office. “Yeah?”

“This doesn’t add up.”

“What do you mean?” Jiyong meandered over. 

“I keep adding it up but it comes out 40,000,000 Won short.”  
((AN: about $36,000/£28,000))

“He probably just forgot to put something in. Not everybody is as obsessive as you.”

“No, it’s not a mistake. There’s some missing off several transactions. Each amount missing is a round number, too. It’s not like it’s just one transaction not accounted for. He’s been skimming money off. It’s deliberate. He probably made a mess of it to try and conceal it. Like look at this... I know for a fact that this transaction on the 3rd should have cost us 10,000,000 not 15,000,000 because I spoke to the guy directly, he didn’t know we were away.”

“Well it’s not really that much. I wear more money than that in clothes and accessories. Maybe even just accessories.” Jiyong shrugged.

“That’s not the point. We can’t let this go. He’s been stealing from us.”

“So we’ll warn him that if it happens again we’ll fuck him up.”

“No. We can’t seem weak. No second chances. We make an example.”

“How? You gonna break his legs? Cut some fingers off?”

Seunghyun stayed silent for a few moments, thinking. “Invite him to meet with you somewhere public so he doesn’t get suspicious and run. Bring him to the slaughterhouse for 10pm tomorrow night and I’ll take care of the rest.”

“What you gonna do? Not gonna kill him are you? Seems a bit extreme.”

“I said I wanted to make an example of him and dead men tell no tales. So no, that would be pointless. Of course I’m not gonna kill him.”

“More fool us for trusting someone who ran from the Yakuza, I guess.” Jiyong pulled his phone out his pocket and sent Uji a message. “You never answered my first question. What you gonna do to him exactly? Is it gonna be messy?”

“Potentially.”

“Plastic sheets and buckets of water messy or kitty litter, a hose and jug of bleach kind of messy?”

“Plastic sheets and bucket of water kind of messy.” 

 

 

———————

 

The man, Uji, had met with Jiyong at a bar the following night but had begun to get suspicious when Jiyong suggested going somewhere else to talk more. He was reluctant to get into the car with him. Jiyong really didn’t feel like breaking a sweat and chasing this guy if he ran. So he went for plan B.

“Look, I’m gonna level with you, Uji. You wanna know why I wanna get you into my car? I was trying to be discreet but it’s so I can get you to let me suck you off.” He said casually. He watched the reaction on the man’s face as his expression moved from wariness to skepticism and confusion. He placed a hand on the man’s thigh and slid it upwards slowly and watched as confusion became surprise. 

“And why the fuck would you want to do that?” Uji tightened his expression up but Jiyong knew he had him.

“You know what gets me off? Being used. Feeling like a dirty filthy whore. I especially love it when I’m sneaking around behind Seunghyun’s back. Makes it even better. And he trusts you so it’s all the sweeter. Don’t worry, he won’t find out.” He reassured him. 

It didn’t take much more persuasion to get the man to agree. They got into Jiyong’s car and Jiyong kept up his act well but by the time he pulled up in the dark alley near the slaughterhouse he noticed the man start to get twitchy again. Jiyong figured there was no point in keeping up the trickery any longer and he pulled a gun out of his waistband. 

“Surprise! No way I’d let you put your dick in my mouth. Can’t believe you fell for that. Sorry to disappoint. Now get out the car real slow with your hands up, Thief.”

“Thief? I don’t know what you mean.” He said but complied. 

“Bullshit.” Jiyong followed him out the car and pressed the gun to the back of his head. “Let’s go inside. You lead the way. You remember how to get into this place don’t ya?” Jiyong himself wasn’t actually sure what they’d find inside. They walked in it seemed empty, aside from the snuffling pigs. The sound gave Jiyong an unpleasant feeling as unwelcome memories of shifting bodies into their enclosure wormed their way back into his head. They passed the freezer they’d been locked in once. It really felt like another lifetime. He steered the man to the room towards the back. 

Inside, Seunghyun sat leaning against the desk casually. He wore dark well fitted trousers and a crisp white shirt. His hair was nearer than how he casually wore it and he was still wearing his glasses. He looked dangerous. And, in Jiyong’s opinion, hot as hell. But hey his opinion was probably biased. There was a chair that had been bolted to the floor and rope draped over the arms. On the desk was various implements and tools and stacks of money. 40,000,000 Won worth, in fact. 

“Take a seat.” The blond said in a relaxed tone, as if he was talking to an old friend.

Jiyong pushed Uji into the chair, keeping the gun on him and taking the ropes with his other hand. 

“I don’t want to hear your speak. If you speak I’ll use that staple gun over there to close your mouth for you.” Uji silently obeyed, obviously knowing what was best for his self preservation. Once he was seated, Seunghyun took the ropes from Jiyong and tied the man’s wrists to the arms of the chair, his ankles to the legs and his torso around to the back. 

“Wait outside Jiyong, please.” He said, straightening up and rolling up his sleeves meticulously.

“Huh? Why?”

“Just do as I ask. Please.”

“Fine but I’m not going far.” Jiyong left the room, closing the door and standing outside of it. He stuffed the gun back into his waistband and listened. 

“40,000,000 Won. I bet you thought I wouldn’t notice. Or maybe I wouldn’t miss such a small amount?” The sound carried through the door loud and clear. Jiyong leaned closer. 

The sound of rustling money. Like it was being scrunched up.

“Open wide. Since you’re so greedy for money I’m gonna make you eat it.”

The sound of gagging and choking. 

“Swallow like a good greedy piggy. That’s it. You’re lucky I brought it in large bills. Less to choke down.”

More rustling and more choking.

“Swallow.” That word in particular made Jiyong shiver. Was it sick that it turned him on a little? Probably. But Jiyong was ok with being a sicko. 

This continued until he heard Uji’s horse croaky voice. 

“You proved your point! I won’t do it again!”

Jiyong thought to himself the man was really in for it now. He had spoken even though he was specifically instructed not to.

“Did you not hear when I told you not to talk?” Seunghyun’s voice was low and level. 

The sound of a palm against a face. Silence followed and then—

“No! Don’t!” Uji’s voice again. Jiyong chuckled darkly to himself, would this man ever learn? Seunghyun was not the kind of guy who asked twice. 

There was the loud click of the staple gun firing off four times in rapid succession along with pained groans. 

The redhead wondered what would happen now. With a closed mouth he couldn’t be force fed the money anymore. So now what? When he heard nothing else he pressed his ear to the door, listening for the slightest noise. 

He almost jumped out of his skin when it came. A sudden loud cracking sound of bone and cartilage. A nasal scream tailing off into whimpers. 

A leg bone being shattered? A kneecap? An arm? He didn’t know. He listened closer again. 

“Guess we do this the easy way, then. I’m going to release your right hand. Write down the names of anybody who was in on this and anybody who knew about it but didn’t rat you out to me. If I think you’re bullshitting me I’ll smash the other. Then I’ll start cutting pieces off you until I feel like you’re being honest with me. Make sure I can read it this time.” 

Shuffling of paper and a mix of other small sounds. 

“Good. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that if you cross me again I won’t be so easy on you. You better thank Jiyong on the way out for keeping me in such a good mood. I’ll even take these out for you.” Pained noises came out, Jiyong assumed that meant Seunghyun was removing the staples. 

Next came the sound of ropes being cut. 

Jiyong e have time to move away from the door before it flew open and he almost fell straight through it. He stood straight, righting himself. The man in front of him had blood leaking through his jeans around his left knee and he had all his weight in the right side. Blood trickled from around his mouth, too. Seunghyun hadn’t been gentle in removing the staples.

“We’ll drop him home. Least we can do, after all. I’ll meet you out at the car, I need to clean up quickly.” Of course he wasn’t going to leave the remaining money laying around. 

“Lets go, fella.” Jiyong felt especially charitable and helped the man walk out back toward the car. But as soon as they were outside Uji took advantage of Jiyong not having his gun in his hands and pulled out a blade. He flung Jiyong forward and took the gun from his waistband but lost his grip and it rattled to the ground. 

Jiyong had no time to react before he was shoved over the hood of the car and the man’s weight was pressing him down with one hand and the other held the blade against his throat. Uji was a bigger than Jiyong and his weight pressing down through his hand onto his chest made it hard to breathe. 

“Seunghyun will kill you if you do anything to me. Are you stupid?”

“He’s gonna kill me anyway, eventually. In fact he’ll probably do worse if I give him time to think about what he might do to me. He’s a fucking psychopath. Let’s see how he likes seeing his little bitch bleeding out like a slaughtered pig, shall we?”

Jiyong spat up in his face. “Go fuck yourself.”

The blade was pressed to his cheek under his eye and he could feel it stinging as his skin gave way to the edge. “Maybe I’ll fuck up your pretty face first.” 

Jiyong closed his eyes and waited for the knife to dig deeper. But it didn’t. Instead there was a gunshot and the full weight of the body above him slumped over on top of him and slid off onto the ground. He opened his eyes and there was blood all over him. 

“What the fuck happened?” Seunghyun ran over, Jiyong’s gun in his hand. 

“He had a knife. Got the jump on me. Didn’t have my gun on him. I didn’t expect—”

“Didn’t expect what? Didn’t you think to search him beforehand? And you let your guard down! That coulda gotten you killed! What the fuck were you thinking!?” He grabbed Jiyong by the shoulders and shook him roughly. 

“I-I’m sorry!” He looked like he was about to cry. 

Seunghyun’s expression softened. “Sorry I yelled at you.... just. Just sit in the car and I’ll take care of this...”

Jiyong nodded dumbly and complied. He sat in the drivers seat and watched as his partner hauled the body back inside. Fuck. He had fucked up. He flipped the visor down to look at his face in the mirror. There was a cut across his cheek oozing blood. Tears prickled at his eyes, not in pain but in frustration. He was angry with himself. Why was he such a damsel in distress? Why was he so stupid? Why didn’t he check the man for weapons and why did he let his guard down? He wanted to punch himself. He deserved it because there Seunghyun was picking up the pieces again while he sat in the car alone and cried like a fucking baby. It was extra salt to the wound that it was he who set them on this path in the first place. Why was his confidence faltering?

He sat lost in his thoughts, looking into the empty space between himself and his reflection. Even as Seunghyun tossed a bucket of water over the hood of the car to wash off the blood. The door opened next to him.

“Don’t you think I should drive?” 

He nodded silently and shuffled over to the passenger seat. Tears were stinging in the cut on his face. 

“Look, it’s ok. I took photos of him on his own phone and sent them to the people on the list of names he gave me. One less rat in the nest.”

“I’m sorry I let you down...”

“Did you not hear what I said? I said it’s ok.” 

 

When they got home he instructed Jiyong to sit on the edge of the bath. He knelt down in front of him and gently dabbed a damp cloth over his cheek, cleaning away the blood delicately like Jiyong was the most precious thing in the world. 

“It isn’t too deep. Probably won’t leave a scar.” He swiped his thumb over the cut, causing Jiyong to flinch. “Sorry I don’t know why I did that...” he took a cotton swab and a bottle of medical alcohol. 

Jiyong didn’t say anything, just watched the other man soak the swab with the alcohol.

“I don’t like when you get quiet, Jiyong. This is gonna sting.”

He whined and tried to pull away when the alcohol met his face but a firm hand kept his head in place. 

“Don’t want it getting infected. Stop being a baby.” He gently cleaned over the cut. Once satisfied he threw the swab into the basin behind and looked over the sad face in front of him. “Hey. Look at me. I’m not angry.”

“No?” Jiyong met his eyes.

“No. I just need you to be more careful. Now more than ever. There’s a lot of people who could be out to get us. The thing about people in ivory towers is they make easy targets.” He picked up a dressing and a pair of scissors to cut off part of one sticky edge to make it fit Jiyong’s face better. “Now hold still. Wear this for a day or two to keep it clean.” He carefully stuck it onto his cheek, being sure not to put it too close to the sensitive skin under his eye so it wouldn’t hurt so much to peel off. 

“Thank you.” Jiyong practically threw himself forward and wrapped his arms around the other man. “But I wanna do more. It’s not fair you get your hands dirty all the time. We’re in it together. You have so many more nightmares these days and I just sit back and buy nice clothes while you drink before noon and sedate yourself almost every night. You brought me back from self destruction and I need to return the favour.”

“Jiyong...”

“Please. Let me help you.”

“Alright but tell me the moment you think you can’t do it anymore.”

“I will.” It was probably a lie. Jiyong would happily burn for him. He nuzzled his face against Seunghyun’s neck as the man gently stroked his hair. 

“It’s late. Lets get some sleep, huh?”

“Tell me you love me, Seunghyun.”

He pulled back and cupped Jiyong’s face in his hands, making eye contact. “I love you, Kwon Jiyong. I love you when you make me coffee. I love you when you drape yourself around me like a wet towel. I love you when you scare me. I love you when you’re being annoying. I love you when you sing in the shower and the way you dance around with your headphones on and I try to guess what you’re listening to. Love the weird things you say and do and I love the way you breathe really loudly when you sleep.”

“Keep going if you like.”

“Pushing your luck again, Ji.”

Jiyong giggled and stood from where he was seated on the edge of the bath. He placed a hand on the top of Seunghyun’s head where the other man was still crouched on the floor. He was reminded of when he was stood over him the day before. 

“You look good from this angle, Hyung.” He dared to grip soft blond hair slightly. 

“Oh, do I? Shame this is your place, hm?”

“Oh yeah? Maybe I wanna switch things up.” He tugged slightly. 

Seunghyun stood up at that and yanked Jiyong forward by his shoulder and brought his palm down hard against his ass cheek. Jiyong yelped in surprise.

“No you don’t. Go to bed. Sleep.” Seunghyun tried to sound serious but he laughed.

“Ok ok!” Jiyong had a grin plastered over his face as he dashed out of the room.

 

—————

 

Jiyong found himself awake in the early hours of the morning. Something Uji had said just struck him. What did he mean when he said that Seunghyun would kill him anyway? He sat up slightly. Why did he say that? Should he be worried? 

No, surely it was nothing. The words of a desperate and irrational man.


	10. Gagged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything is going too smoothly and Seunghyun has a gift for Jiyong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one took a while to write cos it’s one of the longer chapters. Smut about half way through and one does have a description of a panic attack right at the end. Just a warning if you don’t want to read that. Two more chapters to go after this one I think!

Seunghyun had taken it upon himself to visit two out of the three people on the list of names the unfortunate thief had provided. It was down to Jiyong to see the other.

The redhead dressed himself all in black, even sporting a black surgical mask. He vaguely knew this man he was going to see. He was one of the medium rank guys under the old boss, far above him and Seunghyun. But now things had changed. Now they were in charge. It felt a little surreal to Jiyong. As he stopped his car outside the man’s apartment building he took a deep breath. 

He was nervous. 

It wasn’t that Jiyong couldn’t be scary or intimidating. On the contrary, throughout his life there had been many people who were afraid of him. He was the kind of guy who was known to fly off the handle and throw punches at anybody, even if it was someone bigger than him or even a cop. He knew how to fight and in a fit of rage he’d care little for his own safety. Hell, he had once glassed a security guard in the face because the guy had said his clothes were too scruffy to get into a nightclub. But these incidents were usually when he was provoked and under the influence of some kind of substance. A knee-jerk reaction to somebody pushing his buttons. 

This time it felt different. It wasn’t just a spur of the moment rage. He had to think about what he was doing. 

He grabbed a lead pipe off the back seat, tugged the surgical mask up his face slightly and pulled his hood up before heading into the apartment block. He glanced at his phone with the address on to check the floor and door number. He could do this. He was gonna share the workload with Seunghyun and get his hands dirty. 

Jiyong gave himself a mental pep talk as he approached the door and knocked. Holding the lead pipe over his shoulder in an imposing stance. It was a weapon he favoured for the visceral thoughts it struck into people and if he needed to put it to use it required less precision than a knife. Good for breaking bones when wielded correctly. 

He was ready. This motherfucker needed to learn not to cross him and Seunghyun. Give these people an inch and they’d walk all over you. 

The door opened and all the aggressive confidence he’d worked into himself drained right out of him. It was a kid. A little girl who must have been no older than 6 or 7. She looked up at Jiyong with wide eyes for a brief moment before letting out a scream of fear and fleeing inside the apartment. 

Shit. The guy had a kid. He couldn’t threaten and maybe rough up this guy with a kid around. Could he? He stepped inside, pulling the mask off his face and lowering the pipe as the man in question came out of a back room, holding his crying daughter. 

“She’s got your eyes.” Jiyong kept his cool, casually strolling across the room like he owned the place. “You should put her in her room or something. You probably don’t want her to see this.”

“Who’s he?” The girl sniffled, burying her face in her dad’s shoulder. “He’s scary!”

“He’s just Daddy’s boss, honey. He’s here to talk to me.”

“I ain’t gonna hurt you, kid....” The coldness was leaving his voice. 

“Go play in your room for me. Just gotta talk about work stuff.” He set the girl down and she hurried away to her room. 

Jiyong plopped himself down on the couch, somewhat defeated. 

“You’re here about Uji? Look, I won’t lie. There’s no point. I knew he was skimming profits and I told him it was stupid.”

“Shut up. I’m talking now. You should have told us about it. You didn’t. You may as well have stolen the money yourself. But we’re fair. We’re giving you a chance. I’m just here to let you know that you aren’t going to be so lucky next time.” He sat back, one leg crossed over the other to give himself an arrogant posture. 

“It won’t happen again. I have too much to lose. Can’t end up as pig feed like Uji.”

Jiyong was about to question how he knew that but he remembered Seunghyun had sent photographs of Uji’s body to the others involved as a warning.

“I’m glad you’re being rational. I’d hate to have to fuck you up with your kid in the next room.”

“Thank you for... not.” The guy looked genuinely thankful. 

Jiyong had fully intended on going in hard on him but something about the look on the kid’s face had stopped him in his tracks. He sighed deeply, his posture relaxing. “Seriously, though. You cross the line just once more and I’ll have to make you really fucking sorry, man. Don’t make me do that cos I’ll beat you to a pulp with this thing whether the kid is here or not.” He waved the pipe around for effect. 

“Of course. I’m sorry. You should know, though, I saw Uji being taken into the police station a few days back. While the two of you were still away. He was obviously released quickly but maybe you should be aware if anyone under you is being questioned by police.” He looked a little uncomfortable. Almost like he was keeping something back. 

Jiyong raised an eyebrow. “Do you know of anybody else being questioned? You have a police radio scanner if I remember correctly, right?” 

“No. Just the usual sniffing around and chatter but as far as I know nobody else has been picked up.”

“Right.... tell me if you hear about anything else. Can’t have the cops up our asses right now. Not with that big shipment on its way up from Busan.” He stood up, pulling his mask back up his face. “Tell the kid I’m sorry for scaring her...” Maybe Jiyong had more humanity about him than he’d thought. 

 

——————

 

“How did it go?”

“Ugh. Shit. He had a kid. Like there. She answered the damn door and I think probably traumatised her for life.” Jiyong kicked off his shoes and threw himself down onto the couch beside Seunghyun. 

“Oh. Damn. What did you do?”

“Just talked to him. Don’t think he’ll put a toe out of line again. He also told me Uji got questioned by police. So probably just as well he’s dead.”

“Hm. Interesting.”

“God, let’s never have kids. What a pain. I feel like an asshole now.” Jiyong huffed.

“You better stay on the contraceptive pill then, honey.”

“Go fuck yourself.” Jiyong threw a cushion at him.

“I don’t have to. I got you for that.” The blond teased. 

Jiyong gave a snort as he laughed, covering his face in embarrassment of the ugly noise. “Oh my God! I did NOT just snort laugh!”

Seunghyun was laughing loudly at him now. 

“Fuck off Hyung!” 

“Aw sorry I just love it when you do that ugly snort laugh.”

“I just love when you shut up.” Jiyong kicked at him playfully. 

“Lies. You love my voice. No matter what it saying.”

“Whatever.” Jiyong couldn’t really argue with that. 

“Speaking of voices, I got you something on the way home. I’m fulfilling my promise to you.” He motioned to an innocent looking bag sitting beside the coffee table.

“Oh? What promise is that?” Jiyong narrowed his eyes, suspicious. 

“Open it and find out.”

Jiyong padded over to the bag cautiously. “Is it a bag of snakes or something?” He picked it up like it might self destruct at any moment. It wasn’t heavy but there was definitely something in it. He stuck his hand inside, a look of skepticism in on his face. At first he couldn’t tell what it was. It was round and had something attached to it. It almost felt like a dog toy or something like that. 

Then he realised. 

His suspicions were confirmed when he pulled the object out. 

“A ball gag?” Jiyong’s face lit up as he looked over the object. It was a hollow red ball with holes through it and black leather straps attached. He remembered how Seunghyun threatening to buy him one to shut him up.

“Do you like your gift, baby?”

“Of-fucking-course!”

“Then what do you say?”

“Thank you Hyung. Can we play with it now?”

“Of course. Come over here.” The blond man motioned to his lap.

Jiyong complied and made his way over to sit himself with his knees planted either side of Seunghyun’s lap, passing the gag over to him. 

“You won’t be able to use your safe word, do you trust me?”

“Of course. I trust you with my life. Never needed to use it yet anyway.”

“Pinch me hard and we stop.” It was almost just a formality. “Any final requests before I give myself a break from your smart mouth?”

“Wreck me.” Jiyong grinned excitedly. 

“It’s just a shame you won’t be able to beg.” Seunghyun kissed him hard and Jiyong didn’t even have time to melt into it before the other man’s lips left his. “Open wide.”

Jiyong opened his mouth, letting his jaw go slack to accommodate the ball gag while Seunghyun secured the straps around his head. 

“That ok?” 

Jiyong nodded a yes. His jaw had a dull ache from the object invading his mouth and it was dawning on him that he’d end up drooling all over himself. 

“Good. Now get up and take your clothes off for me, baby. I wanna see your pretty naked body all perfect before I mess it all up.”

Jiyong slipped fluidly out of his lap to stand just out of reach. Slowly he started to peel off his clothes. First he unzipped his jacket and slid it off his shoulders, letting it drop to the floor. Even with the gag in his mouth he still looked cocky and in control of the situation. Next his shirt was pulled off and flung into the corner of the room. He hooked his fingers into his own belt loops and tugged his tight black jeans lower on his hips, taking his underwear with them until his hip bones were exposed. Jiyong turned around and wiggled his ass as he slid the garments down his body, bending over and guiding them all the way down to his ankles to give the other man a show. He could feel those hungry eyes on him. 

“You’re such a tease, Jiyong. But you’re too much of a needy little cock hungry whore to keep it up for too long.” 

Jiyong stood up straight and stepped out of his jeans and underwear. He turned back to face Seunghyun, a hand reaching to stroke himself to full hardness. He still looked smug as hell, loving the feeling of being an object of desire. 

“Stop testing my patience and fetch the lube from the bedroom. Then I want you to come back to sit in my lap like a good boy.” 

Jiyong let his hips sway as he walked to the bedroom to grab the lube. He took his sweet time, too. He wanted to tease and make Seunghyun wait. The thought gave him a thrill. The thought of Seunghyun sitting there waiting for him and getting harder by the second. He knew Seunghyun would be thinking about him and all the ways he might have his way with him. Jiyong got off on being wanted. Needed. To be craved. An object of love and lust. 

Eventually the redhead returned with the lube in his hand, wandering casually back into the room. 

“You took your time. Did you get lost?”

Seunghyun could tell by his eyes that Jiyong was grinning despite the ball gag. 

“You were being a tease again, weren’t you? I thought you were gonna he good for me, hmm? After I bought you that nice gift?” He unzipped his jeans and popped the button open. “But I’m nothing if not generous. Come get my cock like the thirsty bitch I know you are.” 

It took all of his discipline but Jiyong slowly crossed the room and sank to his knees in front of the older man so he was between his legs. Jiyong delicately began tugging at Seunghyun’s jeans and underwear to wrap around his half hard cock, pumping and stroking him slowly to full arousal. He was sure to keep eye contact with the blond the whole time. 

“Ah look at Jiyong finally learning self control. Come on up here.” 

Joking crawled up into his lap, setting the lube down beside them. He wanted to kiss the other man but the gag prevented anything like that so he settled for just nuzzling into his neck and groaning softly into the warm skin. 

“You’re getting needy now, hm?”

Jiyong groaned again in admission. 

Seunghyun picked up the lube and coated his fingers but paused when he felt Jiyong’s hands tugging at the buttons of his shirt. “Hands to yourself.”

Jiyong whined a complaint around the gag, his hands stopping and moving to the back of the couch to brace himself as he felt a finger tease at his hole. 

“I should have you wear a plug all the time. Keep you nice and open for me. Would you like that, my love? Walking round with a plug in your ass knowing it’s for me? So I can pull it out and just fuck you whenever I like? You’d love that.”

At that Jiyong pushed himself down on Seunghyun’s finger until it slipped past his rim. He was relinquishing himself and fuck it felt so good. 

“Now you’re fucking yourself on my finger?” Seunghyun smirked and plunged his finger deeper, pressing it straight into the younger’s prostate, making him squeak and jolt violently. “Not so cocky now, hmm?” 

Jiyong felt himself drooling through the holes inter gag. He sat himself up straighter so that Seunghyun could see him. He was already a picture of lust. Face flushed and starting to sweat. 

“Ah look at you.” Seunghyun’s voice rumbled deep in his chest. He kissed and sucked over Jiyong’s neck and shoulder as he fucked into him with one, two and then three fingers. As much as he wanted his cock in that tight warmth he still took his time stretching Jiyong open. Half the fun was having the other man break apart on him. Watching Jiyong turn into a moaning, drooling, writhing mess. He was so drawn in by the redhead bucking his hips into him for friction against his leaking cock. He was addicted to the younger man. 

Finally he withdrew his fingers, causing Jiyong to shiver at the loss and his body to clench around the empty space. “Ride me. Make your Hyung feel good, baby. You can put your hands on my shoulders to steady yourself.” 

Jiyong didn’t need to be told twice. The sweet frustration of not being able to kiss and lick or speak was spurring him on. That and the frustration that he couldn’t put his hands on the fully clothed man’s warm tan skin. It was making him desperate for closeness. He positioned himself and reached down to guide Seunghyun’s long thick cock to his waiting hole, the other hand gripping the man’s shoulder hard as he sank steadily down. He groaned and leaned into Seunghyun’s neck once he was fully seated, giving himself a moment to at least inhale the scent of his skin since he couldn’t taste it. The scent of sandalwood, mild tobacco and and something fresh and earthy that was always there. 

“Fuck, Jiyong. You feel so good. You were made for me, weren’t you?” 

All Jiyong could do in reply was sit himself up and start fucking himself on Seunghyun, languid moans escaping as he rode him as vigorously as his thighs would allow. He went just a little too fast too soon but it was an intentional act. Jiyong loved the burn and slight sharp pain of being over stretched. He felt strong hands on his hips keeping his movements at a steady rhythm. 

Seunghyun had tilted his head back, leaving his neck exposed to Jiyong. He would have made a comment about Seunghyun being the one teasing now, if he could speak. Jiyong whimpered when the blond let a deep rumbling moan escape. He wanted to feel the vibrations of his throat on his tongue. His movements sped up and he leaned himself to a slightly different angle to get friction up against his sweet spot. He closed his eyes and started stroking himself while his other hand still clung to Seunghyun’s shoulder. He felt the man lean forward and lick up his neck where Jiyong was drooling through the gag. Surely he knew exactly what had been going through Jiyong’s head and this was wilful teasing. 

Jiyong’s thighs were burning from the exertion and his movements were faltering. He was getting frustrated with himself now and it was showing. 

“You getting tired? Need me to help you?”

Jiyong nodded pathetically and desperately.

“Get up and lean over the back of the couch.” 

The younger man reluctantly pulled himself off Seunghyun’s cock, letting it slip out of him and leave him feeding empty. Shakily, he scrambled off his lap and on unsteady legs made his way around to the back of the couch, feeling like his limbs were made of tangled noodles. He leaned over it where Seunghyun was still sitting so their faces were close. 

Seunghyun leaned in like he was going to kiss over Jiyong’s sweaty flushed face but stopped just short of making contact. “You’re not the only one who can tease.” He stood and slowly made his way around to stand behind Jiyong, running his hand from the base of his spine up his back to his neck before bringing it back down. 

Jiyong wiggled his hips and whimpered in frustration, not above letting go of all of his pride. Especially when he felt the slide of Seunghyun’s erection over the cleft of his ass, causing friction across his stretched begging hole. He could have cried he was so desperate but instead he started bucking his hips, getting much needed friction from the couch against his weeping cock. 

“Drooling and humping the couch like a bad puppy, hmmm? You really are needy.” He grabbed Jiyong by the hip bones and thrust himself back into his tight heat, earning desperate moans from the man. 

The room filled with the sounds of skin slapping against skin, almost drowned out by Jiyong’s pleasured groans as Seunghyun fucked into him hard and deep, the position making it easier to thrust his hips at just the right angle. He could feel Jiyong’s body tightening up, being driven closer to the edge of release. So he pulled the other man’s smaller frame back so that the friction of the couch was just out of reach from his begging cock. Jiyong made the most satisfying noise of frustration. When Seunghyun’s closed palm came down sharply onto his quivering thigh he yelled sharply and let out a sob. 

“You still good, baby?” As a courtesy he leaned over Jiyong and brought his arm forward over his shoulder within the younger’s reach. When he took Seunghyun’s hand for a second he thought he really was going to pinch him to tell him to stop in the absence of a safe word. But instead, Jiyong just brought the hand to his face to nuzzle it reassuringly. His face was wet with tears, sweat and saliva. Seunghyun almost turned him around so he could see it. 

Instead, he resumed his punishing pace, taking his hand back and regaining his grip on sharp hip bones. He made sure to just about miss Jiyong’s prostate to keep him just a breath away from climax. 

“I’ll fill you up so good, Ji... so close.” He huffed out as his hip movements became a little more erratic, chasing his own orgasm. Finally the coiling heat in his abdomen snapped and he came hard, spilling his seed into Jiyong.

The redhead made a choked sound, feeling the hot liquid pumping into him. But he was so desperate for his own release, his whole body was trembling. 

Seunghyun leaned over and kissed his shoulder. “You’ve been so good. Stand up and turn around for me.” 

Jiyong shivered when he felt Seunghyun pull out of him and semen drip down his thighs. He wanted to obey. Wanted to turn around but his limbs just wouldn’t comply. He needed a second to connect his mind and body back together. Clearly he was talking too long for the other man’s liking because a hand came down sharply against his ass cheek. Fuck, he felt it reverberate through his whole over stimulated body, senses wildly heightened. 

“Hurry up or I’ll edge you all day and all night.” 

Jiyong had to dig deep to force his body to turn around, still leaning his weight on the couch. He could have cried when he watched Seunghyun tuck himself back into his jeans and fasten the front. What was he going to do? 

“Don’t look so worried, Jiyong. But I’m feeling generous.” He cupped Jiyong’s wet face with his hand and Joying leaned into it. “You look so pretty like this.” He took his hand back and reached it into his pocket, pulling out his phone and holding it up. 

Jiyong whined when he realised what he was doing and again when he heard the camera shutter tone. 

“You look so wrecked. I just wanted to capture how fucking beautiful you are.” Seunghyun grinned and slid the phone back into his pocket. “Now then. Do you want to cum?”

Jiyong nodded frantically, pushing his hips forward. He assumed the blond was about to jerk him off so when the man sinks to his knees in front of him he almost loses his balance with surprise. In all the years they’d been having sex he could probably count on one hand the number of times Seunghyun had sucked him off. Fuck. 

“I don’t think this is gonna take long, hmm?”

Need for release aside, Jiyong was determined to make this last as long as he possibly could. Though, when he felt the wet warmth of Seunghyun’s mouth around his neglected cock he knew he wasn’t gonna be able to stretch this out as much as he’d like. So he decided to make the most of it. He dared to bring a hand up to grip at soft blond hair. He half expected to have his hand batted away. So when Seunghyun just continued bobbing his head along his shaft he let his head fall back and groaned shamelessly. Fuck, it felt amazing. He was getting lost in the feeling. Letting his hips twitch forward every now and again as he neared climax. He tried to warn that he was close but a muffled whine was all he could muster. 

Jiyong kind of hoped he wouldn’t pull off because the thought of Seunghyun swallowing his cum was one of the most arousing things he could imagine right now. His fantasy came true when he came suddenly. Hips snapping forward, voice getting stuck in his throat and shooting his load to the back of Seunghyun’s throat and causing him to cough and swallow around him quickly. 

When the blond let him slip out of his mouth Jiyong’s legs finally gave up and he sank to the floor, almost falling straight on top of the other man. He was panting heavily but laughed through the gag as Seunghyun coughed and spluttered a little. 

“I assume you’ve got some smartass comment ready--” another cough “-- for when I take this off.” He reached around to undo the strap and removed the gag. 

Jiyong experimentally wiggled his aching jaw and wiped the drool from his own chin, a dopey grin on his face. “I love you.” His voice was rough from the load moaning. Then, he pulled Seunghyun into a kiss, finally able to use his mouth. 

But then he just couldn’t resist. “Mmh I like kissing you when your mouth tastes of my cum.”

Seunghyun rolls his eyes. “I love you, too. Even your smartass mouth.” 

“I love your mouth, too. Especially wrapped around my dick. You take it sooo well, baby.” He teased. 

“And just like that I’m never letting your dick anywhere near my mouth again. Ungrateful brat.” But he smiled fondly. 

They spent the rest of the day lazing around together. These were the days Jiyong found he now lived for. Suddenly the need for money, power and nice things was nowhere near being his top priority. He no longer felt the need to be the centre of everyone’s attention, just Seunghyun’s. Part of him didn’t know how well that sat with him sometimes, but not now. Now he was happy and content. 

 

—————

 

The next few days passed by quickly. They were actually rather busy with work and as usual Seunghyun would stay up late looking over numbers until Jiyong would wrap his arms around him from behind and beckon him to bed in the early hours each morning. 

One evening Jiyong had convinced Seunghyun to sit and watch a movie with him rather than disappearing into his office. The blond really couldn’t turn down that pleading face and so they curled up together on the couch, Jiyong with his head resting on the other man’s lap. 

Half way through the movie Seunghyun’s phone pinged in his pocket and he automatically reached for it. 

“Ignore it.”

“Could be important.”

“Movie night is important.”

Seunghyun ignored him and took his phone out, he frowned at the screen.

“What is it?”

“One of the guys who knew about Uji stealing from us. The one who you went to see. The one with the kid. He says we need to get out.”

“What?” He sat up and looked at the screen as another message followed. 

“I hope you know I’m loyal to you and I’ll prove it. For my family’s sake. Watch your windows. They’re coming for you tonight. Been listening to the police frequency on the radios.” Seunghyun read out loud. Then the realisation struck like a freight train. “Fuck! Fuck!” He jumped up from the couch and ducked down near the window.

“Who’s coming? The cops? How?” 

“Get over here! Uni must have fucking cut a deal with the cops! That’s why he was in the station. He got lifted and sold us out to save his own skin!” He peered out the window cautiously. “And the fucker’s already dead so I can’t choke the life out of him with my bare hands.” He gritted his teeth. 

“We need to go then!” Jiyong felt the panic rise. 

“Listen to me, grab as much cash as you can stuff into your pockets and the burner phones. Leave anything traceable here.” 

Jiyong nodded and hurried to the bedroom while Seunghyun went to the office and grabbed his records. He dumped them in the basin in the kitchen and pulled out his lighter, lighting them on fire.

“I got cash and the phones.” He shoved some bills and a phone into the older man’s hands. “You take some, too. Where we gonna go?”

“I dunno yet. But we’re gonna have to burn your car first.”

“What?! No!”

“Too much evidence. Blood, weapons, I dread to think how much DNA evidence is in that thing.”

“Fuck. Fine.”

Jiyong couldn’t watch as his beloved car went up in flames. His grief was short lived when the sound of sirens hit his ears. 

“This way!” Seunghyun tugged him along. It was starting to rain. 

“This mean we’re gonna be bandits on the run together? How romantic! Like Bonnie and Clyde!” Jiyong gave a manic laugh, hand still clutching his. 

“Bonnie and Clyde? Didn’t they end up both getting shot or something?”

They went to round a corner but Seunghyun pulled them both back. The cops were there. They could hear sirens behind them, too. They were trapped. They’d just have to run for it.

“We can make it past them if we run.” Jiyong offered.

“If we get separated just keep going and meet at our old apartment building. Where the junkies all hang out to shoot up.”

“We won’t get separated. I’m not letting go.” He gripped Seunghyun’s hand tighter and went to move but the blond stopped him, yanking him back. 

“Wait.” He drew their lips together, letting the fingers of his free hand tangle in wet red hair. 

“Plenty of time for this later.” Jiyong grinned and pulled him along. 

They ran through the streets at breakneck speed, still holding hands. They were weaving in and out of the buildings trying to loose a number of cops chasing them on foot. They knew their way round and were starting to put distance between them and the officers. 

It looked like they would get away until... 

The sound of a gunshot rang out into the air, cutting through the sound of the rain. Then Seunghyun’s hand wasn’t in Jiyong’s anymore. He stopped and spun around to see Seunghyun frozen in place, hand covering where blood was seeping through his wet shirt. 

“Seung—”

“Go!”

“But—”

“Freeze!” An officer yelled.

“FUCKING GO!” 

And Jiyong did. 

When he turned away he heard the sound of a limp body hitting the ground. 

He didn’t look back. 

He ran. 

And ran. 

He didn’t even stop when he heard another gunshot and felt a bullet clip the outside of his thigh. 

He ran and he ran until he couldn’t hear the shouts and footsteps behind him anymore, his tears mixing with the rain on his face. 

Finally he collapsed against a dumpster, sitting in a puddle of dirty water with his knees drawn up to his chest. He’d left him. He’d left Seunghyun behind. He was a coward and a traitor. Seunghyun could have been fatally injured for all he knew. Could already be dead. Dead and alone in a rain soaked gutter. 

His heart was beating in his ears. He needed so desperately to reach out to familiar body heat. But he couldn’t. It wasn’t there to bring him back down. Those hands and that voice weren’t there to ground him. He was spiralling. 

Chest tightening up. 

Mouth dry. 

His fingers numb. 

Stomach twisting. 

Thump. Thump. Pause. Th-THUMP. Thumpthumpthump. Pause. Th-THUMP. 

His heart was stuttering with racing palpitations. The tears came out harder and his body shook violently. Thoughts of his life without Seunghyun filled his mind. Because even if he wasn’t dead he’d be going to prison for sure. Away from Jiyong. And there’d be no way they’d put them in the same one if Jiyong handed himself in. He also couldn’t visit the man without being arrested. He could barely remember a time before Seunghyun. He’d always been there. Now he wasn’t.

“H-Help me.” He squeaked out to the emoty air as the rain pounded down harder. “I n-need you.” The sound of his own pitiful voice hit his ears. Fuck he was so damn pathetic. His stomach cramped up and he threw himself forward onto his hands and knees, gagging and retching but his stomach was empty. He repulsed himself. He was worthless. So weak. He was nothing on his own. 

His limbs gave out and he curled up on the ground. Unmoving. Hugging himself for comfort.


	11. Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When they’re separated it’s up to Jiyong to bring them back together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Been a bit overworked lately so didn’t get this finished as soon as I’d wanted. Thank you for waiting!

It took Jiyong until daylight hit his eyes before he got off the ground by that dumpster. At some point he’d obviously passed out from exhaustion. His body felt stiff and cold, limbs heavy and slow to move as he shifted himself painfully to his feet. His clothes were still soaking wet and he was shivering. He patted his pockets and pulled out soaking wet money and a phone which was well and truly ruined by the rain. He’d passed out in the gutter often enough to know he had to get warm and dry or he’d end up in a pretty bad way. 

But did it really matter now? He wasn’t sure he cared what happened to him anymore. He’d lost everything. 

He dragged himself to a nearby diner to dry off the soaked bills with hand dryer in the restroom so he could at least buy clean clothes. Had had to be careful with his money since it was all he had access to right now. But the temptation go lose himself in a blur of cheap alcohol, pills and white lines was strong. The thought drawing him in. The compulsion to let himself stop thinking or feeling.

No. No, he didn’t do that kind of thing anymore. He had to stop being weak.

He stared at himself in the dirty bathroom mirror. He saw a pathetic mess. A coward. Someone who couldn’t take care of himself. He looked pale and his eyes were red and puffy from crying. What a tremendous fall from grace. 

“What the fuck am I gonna do?” He asked his own reflection. But he was struck with sudden rage. Fuck, he hated himself. Was he really so helpless he bawled himself into unconsciousness in the fucking gutter? He drew back a fist and punched the mirror. It shattered into sharp shards, digging into his knuckles. Blood trickled down cracks, and then came the pain. It brought him back to reality. 

Fuck this. He wasn’t gonna give up. He was getting Seunghyun back. 

He spent a few days trying desperately to think of a viable plan to reunite him with his partner. It didn’t help he was having to lay low and sleep on the street, of course. 

Then it came to him. Jiyong was nursing a cup of black coffee in a dark dirty little coffee shop on a rainy morning. He had his hood pulled up as he watched the news on the small flickering television in the corner. Watching was probably a strong word. More like staring at it without taking in the information. 

Until a mugshot of a familiar face popped up on the screen and he almost threw himself across the table to embrace it. 

“The Druglord, Choi Seunghyun, was arrested in Seoul thanks to the work of—”

Jiyong snorted. Druglord. They were hardly Pablo Escobar. Not yet, anyway. “Maybe in a few years.” He chuckled to himself under his breath. 

“— He will stand trial in 8 weeks. Meanwhile, Kwon Jiyong, is still at large.” His face appeared on the screen. It was an old mugshot from when he was 19 and arrested for prostitution. This was possibly the only time in his life Jiyong had wished he hadn’t aged so well. It still looked like him. 

“— police are requesting information on the whereabouts of this man but urge people not to approach him. He was last seen on CCTV leaving a liquor store in Itaewon-dong, Seoul.”

Jiyong took that as his cue to leave. He finished his coffee and casually exited the cafe so as not to draw attention to himself. He knew exactly what he needed to do now. He needed to get his hands on a good long range firearm. Those weren’t cheap, though. Especially on the black market and he had almost no money now. 

So he did what he needed to do. As much as he didn’t want to, Jiyong didn’t have a choice. There was only one way to make good money quickly while staying off-grid. He sold his body to dirty old men looking for a good time. He felt so fucking disgusting while he was doing it. He’d only sold himself a couple of times before when he was a teenager and they had ran away from home together. Back then he’d fill himself up with benzodiazepines so he’d barely notice it was happening. Now, their touches made him feel sick to his stomach. Each time it was over he thought he’d never be clean again, wanted to rip off his skin and grow a new one. 

He kept considering stealing but that ran the risk of getting him arrested. He was go use behind bars. 

Eventually it paid off. Jiyong bought himself a good rifle and practiced every waking moment. He wasn’t a marksman by any means. In fact he could barely shoot a handgun. So he needed practice. Needed to get as good as he possibly could in just a few weeks. 

It had taken him longer than he’d like to admit to work out how to load and fire the damn thing. The first time he fired it he was shocked by the amount of recoil and felt it through his whole body. Like every bone in his body was rattling. 

When he started target practice he realised how unsteady his hands were. That was a problem. Shaking hands could mean the difference between success and a terrible failure with a horrible outcome. He remembered Seunghyun taking propranolol to steady his hands once before. He reasoned with himself that it wasn’t a recreational drug. It didn’t count as falling back into old habits. This was fine. 

 

——————

 

The last thing Seunghyun had seen before his vision faded out to black was Jiyong’s face as he turned and ran. Good. He’d get away. The last thing he wanted was for them both to end up behind bars. 

He didn’t remember hitting the floor. But he did remember the sound his own body made hitting the hard wet ground. But no pain. He couldn’t remember feeling anything, actually. The adrenaline numbing him. 

The next lucid moment he had was waking up to a tightness in his abdomen. Then came the pain. The second thing he realised was the fact he couldn’t move his arms. What the fuck? He opened his eyes and squinted into harsh artificial light above him. He was in a hospital room. His left arm had a line connecting his veins to a bag of clear fluid. He squinted to read what was printed on the bag. 0.9% Saline. It took a moment for him to realise he was handcuffed to the sides of the bed and another moment to realise why. Of course. There were officers outside the room, he could see them through the glass window. Through everything they’d done he hadn’t really considered being arrested as a real risk and yet here he was. In handcuffs. 

Soon, the doctor explained he’d had surgery to remove the bullet from his abdomen. They said he’d been lucky and no major damage was done. His stomach dropped when the doctor added that he’d be well enough to be transferred to jail to await trial in about two days. This was really happening. He was going to jail and he was going to be separated from Jiyong. What had even become of Jiyong? Was he still free? He had no idea. 

The doctor left and his eyes met those of the officer now standing in the corner of the room. 

“Aren’t you supposed to tell me what I’m charged with?”

“Conspiracy to distribute and supplying illicit substances. Money laundering. They’re still gathering evidence on charges of GBH and there have been some disappearances associated with you and your partner. I’m sure we’ll get plenty of evidence in relation to that. I dare say multiple counts of murder by the time we get to trial. There’s also an old public disorder and possession charge on you that they’ll tag on for good measure.”

“Where’s Jiyong?”

“Kwon Jiyong is still at large. This could work out well for you. If you help us and tell us where he could be hiding they’ll go easy on you. Sing on him before he sings on you.” 

“I’m not telling you shit.” He was relived Jiyong was still free but at the same time worried about how he was doing on his own, hoping he was staying off-grid.

“Off the record, Choi. If you drop these suspected murders onto him and tell us where he is you could be out in 20 years. If you don’t, you’re never gonna walk free again.”

Seunghyun opened his mouth to tell him to get fucked but the officer cut him off. 

“There’s only so many places someone like him goes. A junkie with his kind of criminal record is probably better off in jail for his own sake.” He took out a notebook. “4 police cautions. Two of which are theft of a vehicle. One for prostitution. One for public intoxication. Conviction for possession of narcotics. 6 outstanding warrants for assault, damage to public property and minor drug related charges. I’ve seen people like him before. He’s gonna spiral off the edge. In jail he can get on a programme and stay clean.” 

“Go fuck yourself.”

“Still time to change your mind, Choi. Court isn’t for a while yet.”

Seunghyun said nothing to that. 

 

—————

 

Prison was possibly the worst kind of hell for Seunghyun. All of his autonomy and control taken away from him. A caged animal in amongst other caged animals. The intimidating aura he carried did well to keep the inmates away from him for the first week and he did his best to not let on that he was injured. He didn’t want to show weakness because his abdomen still hurt and he was pretty sure he wouldn’t win a fight against a big thug with a prison sculpted body. 

Everything changed when he was eating alone in the corner of the noisy canteen. He poked and prodded at the tasteless food on his tray when he felt a presence behind him. He took a long slow breath and turned around to the man towering over him and the three guys standing alongside him. This guy had made a few comments directed at Seunghyun in passing and he was well known for picking fights with people. This wasn’t good. 

“Can I help you?” Seunghyun kept a level but firm voice. 

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed how you sit around thinking you’re better than this place. Better than the rest of us.” The convict sneered. 

“I’m not sure I know what you mean.” He knew exactly where this was going. 

“Got news for you. You may have thought you were top dog outside but in here you’re my bitch.”

Seunghyun didn’t want to rise to it. He really didn’t. But that dark place inside of him did, and after being shut in that place had made it all the more hungry. He stood slowly and turned around to face the guy. Seunghyun was slightly taller but the convict was much broader. 

“Got news for you. I’m nobody’s bitch. I wasn’t anyone’s bitch when I was a homeless teenager. I wasn’t anyone’s bitch when I was slinging single packets of coke in nightclub bathrooms. I wasn’t anyone’s bitch when I was rolling in money and I certainly ain’t anyone’s bitch in here.” His jaw was clenched, as were his fits at his side. 

“Seen you on the news. Sure hope they bring that partner of yours in. He’s pretty. I’d love to see how tough you are when every sicko in this place is all over him while all you can do is watch.” The guy smirked. But the smirk didn’t last long before Seunghyun’s fist was connecting with his jaw with an audible crack. 

Seunghyun didn’t give him a chance to rebound. He landed a hard fast kick to the guy’s kidney while he was still stumbling back from the punch. The impact sent him to the floor hard and Seunghyun was on him instantly, punching at his face. 

A crowd formed quickly, the guards not caring about inmates fighting as long as nothing got too out of hand. Someone stepped forward to try and pull Seunghyun off but was stopped by another convict. The worlds “psycho” and “crazy” audible over the jeering. 

“Who’s the bitch now?” Seunghyun sat upright. A planned deception to let the guy under him think it was over. But it wasn’t. Seunghyun wrapped his bloody hands around his throat. Squeezing tighter and tighter. The man struggled and scratched at the hands that were crushing his windpipe. Lips starting to turn a slight shade of blue. The sinister space in Seunghyun’s mind took sick satisfaction in seeing the panic in someone’s eyes as they realise death is rapidly approaching. 

That was the point where two guards pulled him back, he heard the man coughing and gasping for air. Seunghyun didn’t struggle as he was dragged away and thrown roughly into solitary. Didn’t even flinch when the door slammed shut and he was left in darkness. He felt numb. He let the animal out and he couldn’t control it. Almost choked a man to death in the middle of an audience. And he would have. Would have gripped his throat until his heart stopped beating. If he hadn’t been interrupted. And for almost no reason. Just verbal threats. Fuck, he should have stopped. This place was not only taking away his autonomy but his control over himself. 

He hated it. What kind of monster was he going to become after spending years behind bars? And without Jiyong. Without being able to see him. Hear him. Touch him. Jiyong was his balance. Kept him grounded. In control. 

His face felt wet. He brought his hand up to his cheek and wiped away the moisture. He expected it to be blood that had spattered onto his face but when he looked at his fingers he saw it was tears. All Seunghyun could do now was wait for his court date and prey that Jiyong would keep his head down and not end up arrested. 

 

————

 

The court date arrived slowly for Seunghyun but quickly for Jiyong.

Jiyong swallowed 80mg of propranolol and planted himself in a high-rise hotel room opposite the courthouse and set up his rifle at the window. When he saw the police vehicles roll up outside the he brought his eye down to the scope and settled himself, getting comfortable. He watched as Seunghyun was hauled out of the police van in handcuffs, armed guards around him. 

He looked like he’d lost weight. His dark roots were growing through his bleach blond hair and he had a black eye that was fading away. Seeing him through crosshairs made Jiyong’s stomach twist. This was a risk. A huge risk. For many reasons. The one he was most worried about was the fact he wasn’t a trained sniper. By any means. A few weeks of practice wasn’t anywhere near enough. His plan was to create chaos, maybe take out a couple of armed officers if he’s lucky and give Seunghyun an opening. He was terrified he’d end up hitting Seunghyun in the process, though. What would he do if he accidentally killed him? Well, actually Jiyong knew exactly what he’d do if that happened. But the less he thought about that the better. 

This was his only chance, he had to take it if he was every gonna get Seunghyun back. 

He took the first shot into the empty steps of the courthouse and watched the media scatter like cockroaches. He quickly took another shot at the van just as they started to steer Seunghyun back towards it. Seunghyun was roughly pushed to the ground. 

“Sorry man, nothing personal...” He took a breath and fired at a cluster of armed officers. He hit one. He noticed one guard point up in his direction. Fuck. He took a few shots in quick succession. Most not hitting anything and some hitting officers. 

He focused the site back on Seunghyun. He saw the blond look up and around obviously calculating whether or not he should take advantage of the confusion. 

“Go. Run. Please. Take it. Take the chance.” He fired off a shot into a police car near Seunghyun. 

Apparently that shot gave him the push he needed. He scrambled to his feet and took off running. 

Jiyong threw down the gun and took off, too. He sprinted down the fire escape and jumped back into the car he’d stolen for the occasion. There were already police everywhere. He hoped Seunghyun would go where he thought he would. He took a few shortcuts through the streets, trying his best not to drive recklessly enough to draw attention. Just a typical road rage driver and nothing more. 

Eventually, he came to the alley behind their old apartment. But Seunghyun wasn’t there. Shit. It was maybe a long shot that he’d come here for lack of somewhere else to go. But above that, this was the place they’d agreed to meet if they were separated when running from the cops. He thumped his head on the steering wheel. He wasn’t coming. 

Jiyong sat back in the seat and tried to work out where Seunghyun might go.

But then he saw him in the rear view mirror. Sprinting in his direction. He did come. Jiyong threw half his body out of the drivers side window. 

“Going my way?” He called out and Seunghyun stopped dead in his tracks. 

“Jiyong?!”

“Get in, asshole!” Jiyong had a wide grin on his face.

Seunghyun took another half a second before climbing into the back of the vehicle. 

“Just stay down.” He hit the gas and sped off, heading in the direction out of Seoul. 

Seunghyun complied, ducking down in the seat. “How did you know?”

“You said if we got split up we should meet back there. Figured you might go there anyway because it’s familiar. Even if you didn’t realise it was me shooting outside the courthouse.”

“So that was you!? Fucking hell Ji, I thought someone was trying to assassinate me!”

“To be honest anything I hit was probably pure fluke, probably a miracle I didn’t shoot you. Just wanted to give you an opening to run.”

“You don’t know how glad I am to see you. Fuck I missed you.”

“Couldn’t let you rot in prison. I’d have gotten jealous if you’d have found yourself a prison bitch.”

“Of course.”

“Seriously, though.... I don’t think I could survive without you.... Anyway. Shut the fuck up for a minute will you? I need to concentrate.” He pulled his hood up and pushed a pair of sunglasses onto his face. 

“Look at you, coming to my rescue. My knight in shining armour.”

“I said shut the fuck up will ya?” The redhead laughed. “You’re making me wanna pull over and ride your dick in the back seat.”

Seunghyun laughed out loud. “So THATS why you did it. You missed my dick!”

“No more talking. Daddy’s getting mad and he’ll turn this car round and take you back.”

“Oh fuck please don’t tell me you developed a daddy kink.” He couldn’t resist. 

“No!”

“Sorry I just had to say it. I just really missed you.” He stayed down and stayed quiet until they were driving out of Seoul. It took a while because Jiyong had to keep changing direction to avoid police stop-and-searches. 

Finally, Jiyong pulled off the road into a secluded area. 

“I brought you a change of clothes. They’re in the trunk.”

Seunghyun climbed out and stretched his legs, wandering around to the front of the vehicle. “You got anything to take these cuffs off?” 

Jiyong followed him out of the car and circled the taller man like a hungry shark before crowding him against the hood until Seunghyun lost his balance and ended up sitting on it. “Dunno. Maybe I like you in handcuffs.”

“You’d look better in them, you horny little fuck.” Seunghyun sounded amused. 

“It’s been two months. Can you blame me?” He placed his hands on the warm metal either side of the other man’s hips. 

“Just you wait til I’m out of these.”

“Maybe I should make the most of it then, hmm? Always wondered what fucking you would like.” His knee came up between Seunghyun’s legs. 

“You have already.” Seunghyun didn’t change his amused expression but also didn’t give the younger man an inch.

“That was different. I was tied to the bed and you were riding me and didn’t let me cum for 6 hours. I’m talkin’ bout me turning you over and fucking you on the hood of this car. Maybe if you’re a good boy I’ll eat you out first.”

He was just teasing. Right? 

“Go ahead then. Maybe it’ll be fun.” Seunghyun tried to call the bluff. 

Jiyong pulled him forward and turned him around, pushing him back down roughly against the car. He landed a hard spank to his left ass cheek. 

“Yeah? Would you like that? Is Choi Seunghyun really admitting he’s hungry for my dick in him? Prison’s changed you.” He landed another hard smack on his ass cheek.

“Yeah sure. If you want.” He liked when Jiyong got confident on an adrenaline high. It was one of the games they’d always played. Sometimes he’d let Jiyong take it further than others but in the end he’d always take back control. 

It got him riled up and that’s what Jiyong liked. Fun and games. Fuck, he missed this. Jiyong knew exactly what he was doing. He loved shifting the power dynamic because he loved when ultimately he’d be put in his place. 

“You’re playing the game well.” He really had no intention of trying to dominate Seunghyun but it was fun to push him as far as he’d dare. He lifted the other man’s prison issue vest with the intention of kissing his tailbone and letting him go. But he froze. There were dark bruises on the sides of his back. He pushed it up higher. More bruises. “What...?”

“Prison guards. They like hitting in the kidneys, the upper back and legs. Marks invisible under clothes. They wanted to get a rise out of me after I had an altercation with another inmate.” 

Jiyong stepped back. “Oh shit... sorry I was rough. I was only messing around....” 

“It’s fine. I know.” He stood up and turned to face him, only to be met by desperate lips. They kissed each other hungrily, almost knocking Seunghyun back over onto the car hood. There were tears leaking down Jiyong’s cheeks, he didn’t think he’d ever get to do this again. The warm wet slide of tongues and grazing of teeth over lips was deliciously familiar. It was calming and felt like home. Seunghyun tasted of safety. 

“Have you got anything to take these things off or not?”

Jiyong pouted at the loss of contact. “Yeah, yeah.” He made his way to the trunk and opened it. “I hope these get through them.” He said grabbing a large set of bolt cutters.

“Uh, I’m not sure I trust you with those.”

“Excuse me. But who sprang you from jail?”

“Alright alright.” He held his wrists out. “Just the chain between them first. A practice round.”

Jiyong placed the jaws around the chain and cut through it easily. “See? Gimmie your wrist. Ye of little faith.”

Seunghyun offered his non dominant wrist first. 

Jiyong just rolled his eyes in response and brought the bolt cutters around the handcuffs. The lower jaw of it digging into his skin. 

Then he pretended he was going to sneeze. 

“Don’t fuck with me.” 

The redhead laughed and cut through the thing in two attempts before doing the same on the other side. He put on a bad impression of Seunghyun’s voice. “Thank you Jiyong. I’m sorry I doubted you. You’re so beautiful and talented and amazing.” He smirked. 

Seunghyun cupped his cheeks gently in his hands and spoke to him softly. “Thank you Jiyong. I never doubted you. Never will. That’s why I told you to run. I knew you’d work something out. You’re smart and creative enough for that. I love you. And I missed you every terrible second I was in that place.” He placed a kiss to his forehead. “Now we should get going.”

Jiyong watches as Seunghyun changed his prison clothes for the jeans and t-shirt in the trunk. He knew this man’s body in vivid detail and he could tell he had changed. He’d lost weight, that much was true. But as well as that he’d obviously been working out. His muscles were more defined now. The dips ran a little deeper and the angles were a little sharper. 

“Kinda disappointed you don’t have prison tattoos.”

“Remember when one of your tattoos got infected and you thought you were gonna die? And you got delirious with fever and thought you were a rug? Then you cried when I told you that you weren’t?”

“Yeah yeah yeah. Alright, no need to bring it up again.” Jiyong gave a crooked grin.

Seunghyun returned the grin and slid back into the car. “So what now?”

Jiyong climbed into the driver’s seat. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I’m pretty sure every single police officer in the country is gonna be out looking for us.”

“Maybe we should leave the country.”

“Pretty sure as soon as we set foot in somewhere like an airport we’ll have a SWAT team up our assholes.”

“Well I’ve been called a cockslut but I think a whole SWAT team up my ass might be a bit much.”

“Jokes aside, Jiyong, we really need to come up with something.” 

“Yeah... to be honest I didn’t expect my plan to even work. I’m just so happy to have you back. It was awful....”

“We’ll think of something, Ji.” Seunghyun smiled.


	12. Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys come up with a plan!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so the end had to be re-written twice. Once due to me not being happy with the first version. And then again because of data loss when my computer got ruined and my frustration kinda killed my inspiration and inclination. But here we are! This turned out crazy long so I decided to split it into two chapters and will post them like an hour apart.
> 
> Again I am soooooo sorry this took so long. Please forgive me!

“Oh fuck yessss— ah!” Jiyong’s voice was muffled by the weird smelling pillow of the shitty motel room, his face buried in it. The upper half of his body had collapsed onto the bed and his ass was in the air with his legs spread wide, thighs trembling with the effort of keeping his lower half up. He’d already climaxed untouched on Seunghyun’s fingers, leaving his body sensitive and burning with over stimulation as he was fucked hard. 

Fuck, it felt so good.

Seunghyun grabbed his shoulders and jerked him up, bringing his face out of the pillow. “I wanna hear you. Want everyone in this place to hear what I’m doing to you. C’mon Ji, let them know how fucking good I make you feel.” He growled as Jiyong held himself back up on all fours on wobbly arms. 

“P-Please ca-aaahh! Can I c-cum? Oh f-fuck!” His hair was sticking to his forehead. “P-Please don’t edge me.” He begged. 

“Cum for me whenever you like, Ji.” He kissed the sweat soaked back of his neck, sucking a mark into the skin before straightening up to thrust his hips at a more brutal pace while he stroked Jiyong’s neglected cock. 

“Oh my God!” Jiyong could feel his body tightening up, his hips jerking against his will. He was lost to the almost painful pleasure and there was nowhere on earth he’d rather be.

“Let go so I can fuck you through it.” 

Jiyong didn’t need any further permission. His body jerked and spasmed as his orgasm hit him like a train. A high pitched “FUCK!” was the only distinguishable word he managed to get out through a noise somewhere between a scream and garbled nonsense. Seunghyun was holding him up by his hip bones now, fucking into him until he reached his own release and spilled deep into the redhead in hot bursts. He moaned deeply against the wet burning sweaty skin of Jiyong’s upper back, the rumble of his voice breaking through the pleasant ringing in Jiyong’s ears.

Jiyong groaned as he felt Seunghyun pull out of him and flip his limp spent body over so that he lay panting on his back.

“You’re crying.” Came that deep voice in a breathless whisper. Jiyong touched his own cheeks. There really were tears. 

“Good kind of cryin’... love you so fuckn’ much.” He panted out, catching his breath. 

Seunghyun collapsed next to him and pulled him into his arms, kissing his wet cheeks. “I think I like making you cry. This kind of crying, of course.”

The blonde slid off the bed to fetch a damp cloth from the grimy motel bathroom. He tried to get the water to run warm but it had remained cold. He supposed it would have to do. As soon as the cold wet cloth touched the skin of Jiyong’s inner thigh, the younger jolted away from it with a yelp. 

“Yah! What the actual fuck? We were having a tender moment and you come in and put that on me?!”

“Sorry, my love, no hot water.” He laughed and pulled Jiyong down the bed by his leg so he could reach him. 

The redhead twisted and squirmed as Seunghyun cleaned away the semen and excess lube. It was like trying to bathe an angry cat but the older man couldn’t help but laugh as he dodged a swipe of protest from Jiyong. 

“Almost clean, then I’ll warm you up. I promise.” 

“You’re enjoying this too much.” Jiyong smacked him with a pillow which was promptly snatched and tossed back at him.

“Not at all.” Seunghyun discarded the cloth as Jiyong dived under the blankets, being sure to hog them all. 

“You get to sleep in the cold now.” Only tufts of his hair were visible from underneath the blankets. 

Seunghyun tugged on his boxers and t-shirt so he wouldn’t freeze and lay on the bed. He pulled the blankets down from Jiyong’s face. “Can we be serious for a second? I think I know what we need to do about our situation. Hear me out.” 

“I’m all ears.”

“We need to die.” 

“Excuse me?”

“Die. That’s the only way. They can’t arrest dead men.”

“I can’t kill myself! What if I pussy out at the last second!? You’d have to do it for me! Like a murder/suicide. Can you shoot me in the head? Make it quick and merciful. Actually no. That would probably fuck up my face. I wanna look good in my casket. Maybe you should choke me to death. I could probably die happy then. Wait... but I don’t really want them telling my mother they found my strangled corpse covered in my own jizz. Like, I’ve done a lot of shit for her to be ashamed of in the 10 years since I saw her last but that would probably top it.” Jiyong rambled on.

“Whoa. Whoa. Shut up for a second. I didn’t mean actually kill ourselves. But you took it real well for someone who thought that was what I had suggested which is a little unsettling.”

“Oh thank God. Fuck. What do you mean then?”

“We fake our deaths. Then flee the country. We would need to get fake passports and then we can go to somewhere like Japan or Hong Kong.” 

“Japan. Easier to disappear there and neither of us know a lick of Cantonese or Mandarin. But how the fuck we gonna make people think we’re dead?” 

“We would send a tip-off that we’re somewhere and there’d have to be a fire or something to make the bodies harder to identify. We’d need two guys who are our size. They probably don’t have our DNA on record and they definitely won’t have our dental records because I’m pretty sure the last dental work either of us had was you pulling out one of my molars for me.”

“Ah yes, I remember that. You bit me.”

“You were taking too long. It fucking hurt! Shoulda just yanked it out in one go. It was half hanging out anyway.” He pulled at the blanket, unravelling it from the younger man.

“Pull your own damn tooth next time.” Jiyong swatted at his arm and pulled the blankets back.

“Anyway! Back on track. I doubt they’ll even investigate that much. It looks better for them if we’re dead rather than out on the run. Even if they think we’re dead long enough for us to get out of the country without the authorities or goddamn Interpol picking us up.” 

“What we gonna do after that? After all of that. If we do get to Japan what are we gonna do?” 

“I’d really like to live in a tiny shithole with you again. Work my fingers to the bone doing grunt work to keep a roof over our heads and wake up next to you every morning. Wanna adopt a cat because we wouldn’t have the time for a dog. I don’t wanna kill or hurt anyone again, Jiyong. It brings things up in me that I don’t like. Things I’ve spent a lot of time keeping from breaching the surface. If that means I have to scrub pots or drag crates around for 14 hours a day then so be it.” He looked down solemnly, hair flopping into his eyes. “I want to just have you. I don’t need anything or anyone else.”

Jiyong felt guilt reach up inside his chest and grip his heart. “I know.... you tortured yourself to give me things I thought would make me happy. I’m sorry I didn’t realise it wasn’t the money and power that made me happy. It was having you. It was knowing you loved me like I loved you. I think I was just too egotistical and caught up in it all, greed got the best of me. I could see what it was doing to you, that you weren’t ok, but I was selfish and stupid. I almost lost you because of it. When I thought you were dead I wanted to die, too.”

There was more to it than that. Jiyong had played on that part of Seunghyun. Used his demons to get him to do all the dirty work. Used him. The only person who gave a fuck about him. He regretted it. Even while he was doing it he knew it was wrong. But he was weak. Too weak to do those things himself. Too afraid and the selfish greed outweighed his humanity and turned him into a monster.

“It’s ok...” Seunghyun gently stroked his fingers through Jiyong’s hair. 

“Don’t. You forgive me too easily.” 

“Yeah, but I don’t care.”

Seunghyun didn’t say anything else, neither of them did. They just lay there until they fell asleep.

 

 

——————

 

The next morning they began running through the plan over cheap motel room coffee. Seunghyun thought it tasted like someone cleaned out the back of a coffee machine and boiled the built up grime in dirty water.

“So, how we gonna do this? Make it look like an accident? Murder/suicide pact?”

“What is it with you and murder/suicide? The bodies just have to be pretty fucked up so how they die doesn’t really matter. Long as there’s nothing left for forensics. Probably a small knife to the carotid. Bullets might stay in the body and if I strangle them I’ll probably fracture their hyoids, two bodies with hangman’s fractures would look suspicious.”

“How bout we get an expensive hotel room. We’ll use our real identities, I still have my credit card, and make sure at least someone tips off police to us being there. We drag the corpses up the back staircase, then you fuck me on the comfy expensive bed and then we set the room on fire with the decoy bodies.”

“That’s pretty good. Except the fucking part. I don’t think we would have time for that. Don’t really want to risk having a load of heavily armed cops busting into the room as I’m about to bust a nut. Also, the two corpses in the room might give me some performance anxiety”

Jiyong gave him a mock pout. “Fiiine.”

“First things first, one of us needs to go back into Seoul and get the fake passports. That friend of yours can hook us up, right? Would you trust him?”

“Youngbae? Yeah. Not spoken to him for a while but he probably still hangs out in the same dark corners as he always did.” Jiyong paused “Wait. What do you mean by one of us?”

“We can’t risk both of us going back into Seoul. They’ll expect us to be together, it’ll draw attention if we’re both walking around there. I’ll go.”

“No! I don’t wanna loose you again!”

“You know it makes sense, Ji. I don’t wanna loose you either which means I don’t want us arrested and put in prisons on the other side of the country from each other.”

“Fine. But I’ll go. I’ll be able to find him faster and he knows me better. We should save what little money we have and he’ll probably give them to me in exchange for a favour. I wanna carry my own weight in this, you can trust me.”

“What kind of favour?”

“Oh you know. He always had a thing for me. I’ll probably just suck his dick or something.” Jiyong said it so casually and it made something uncomfortable prickle up Seunghyun’s back. 

“I would really rather you didn’t do that.”

“It doesn’t mean anything. Just business. How do you think I made enough cash for the gun and ammo?” 

That realisation made Seunghyun feel nauseous. “I don’t like you selling your body. You’re not a whore. I don’t want someone else touching you.”

“I won’t let him kiss me or anything like that. I promise. I only want you, don’t worry.”

“That’s— That’s not the point... you’re better than that...”

Jiyong placed a kiss on his cheek. “You know it makes sense.” He mirrored his words back at him. Seunghyun knew there was no arguing at this point. Jiyong was the kind of man who would do whatever he felt he needed or wanted to do. 

“I’ll catch the first train in the morning. I’ll keep you posted, don’t worry. I’ll be in and out of there as quickly as I can.”

“Don’t steal any cars.”

“Yeah yeah.” Jiyong laughed.

 

————-

 

 

The train journey took a couple of hours. Jiyong was starting to get nervous as it approached Seoul. He looked out of the window, tugging his snapback down a little and pulling his mask up over his mouth and nose. Was like this before he started drinking and taking drugs? He couldn’t really remember. It was hard dealing with his nerves with nothing to numb him.

His heart was in his mouth as he trawled the familiar rat-runs and darkest parts of Seoul’s underbelly. It wasn’t like he was afraid of being mugged or assaulted. That wasn’t really something he’d ever been afraid of. It was the fact his was a familiar face around these parts and if someone tipped off the authorities it would all be over.

It took him a while to check over the old haunts he knew Youngbae frequented but eventually he lucked out in an illegal betting parlour he remembered his old friend had a hand in. 

“Hey! Look what the cat dragged in! Kwon Jiyong, I hear you’ve been a bad boy.” The place was empty except for Youngbae sitting behind the counter with his feet up on the desk and a wide smile on his face. 

“I’ve always been a bad boy. Maybe a little more bad than usual lately, though.” He slinked over to the desk, placing his palms on it and leaning over slightly.

“I assume this reunion is because you want something? Your faces are all over the news, you’re in some pretty hot water, my friend.”

“Yeah, I’ll cut to the chase because I don’t have much time. You still doing fake IDs and passports? We need out and I need your help. I need two Japanese passports. One for me, one for Seunghyun.”

“Of course! You’re practically a celebrity, I’ve been bragging that I know you.” Youngbae sat up excitedly. “That was a hell of a daring escape, I assume you were the one doing the shooting outside the courthouse.”

“Of course. So, can you help out an old friend?” Jiyong cocked his head.

“Yeah, I can help you out.” The younger man grinned. 

“As for payment... since we’re on the run we’re kinda short on cash and we need to buy plane tickets. So... I was thinking you and I could work out some kind of alternative payment?” Jiyong leaned closer over the counter and brought his own lower lip between his teeth seductively. He made sure his body movements were as smooth and graceful as possible. Like a snake. 

“Oh? Like what?” The dark haired man raised a coy brow.

“I’m not letting you fuck me.” Apparently that’s where Jiyong drew the line now. Having a line was something new. He surprised even himself. But the thought of anyone other than Seunghyun fucking him made his skin crawl. “I’ll fuck you or I’ll suck you off. Up to you. No kissing and you can’t leave marks on me.” At least Youngbae was a friend and not a dirty old man.

“Great offer but I’m gonna have to decline. You and Seunghyun are an item these days, right? Finally, by the way. Took you long enough.” He relaxed back in his chair, placing his feet back up on the desk. “I don’t wanna put my hands on anything belonging to that guy. I kinda feel like he’d fuck me up, he always scared me a little. Besides, I’m not gonna take advantage of a friend in need. Just send me a postcard from Japan after the heat dies down. Passports are on the house.”

“Seriously?” 

“Yeah. Gimmie two days. Where are you staying?”

“Nowhere.” Jiyong admitted. He hadn’t really thought that far ahead. Probably a doorway in an alley or something like that. 

“I got a perfectly good musty smelling couch if you’re interested.”

“Ah you’re the best! But... why? You do realise I’m like Korea’s most wanted, right? Isn’t that a big risk for you?”

Youngbae shrugged casually. “You’re a friend. You helped me out a few times along the road. Seunghyun, too. I owe you both a lot, actually.”

 

 

————————

 

It was nice to catch up with his old friend, it put the world into perspective after the rollercoaster his life had been. 

Jiyong didn’t really sleep that night. It was nothing to do with the uncomfortable couch, or the fact that it smelled like an old body bag. It just felt lonely. He’d only just got Seunghyun back and now he was sleeping alone again. Part of him wondered if his attachment was healthy. But then again, if their relationship was unhealthy he didn’t have any desire to be healthy. Their codependency was all he wanted in life now. He fired off several texts to Seunghyun to assure the other man everything was fine and that Youngbae had agreed to make the passports without payment of any kind.

He didn’t leave Youngbae’s tiny apartment for the two days he was in Seoul, figuring that going out would be a pretty stupid thing to do, considering he was a wanted criminal. Instead, he sat googling his own name. He learned that apparently in the hale of bullets he’d accidentally killed 3 police officers. 

So that was a thing, he thought. 

He’d killed someone. Three people, no less. 

Actually took human lives. 

Granted, there was the impersonal nature of a long range weapon. Physical distance and a certain randomness which came with not being a professional shooter separated him from his victims. He wasn’t actually trying to actually kill anyone. It was just a consequence he’d considered but chosen not to dwell on. 

He thought he’d feel more guilty. He should.

So was this what it was like to kill? Surely not. Maybe it hadn’t sunk in yet? Maybe it was because these were faceless people standing between himself and the man he loved more than life itself. It wasn’t like thrusting a blade into someone with intent to kill. He told himself that multiple times, trying to reassure himself he really did have a soul. 

He ran it through in his head again and again. Trying to find the guilt. Three people. Just doing their jobs. Three families who wouldn’t see their loved ones again.he looked up the officers who had died and stared at their faces. 

And there it was. Finally, the guilt. A young woman, new to the force her parents had been so proud. A man a couple of years older than him who had just got married, his new bride was expecting their first child. Finally, a man in his late 30s, he had a wife and three kids. It made him think about how he felt when he thought he’d lost Seunghyun. How utterly desperate and alone he felt in the world. That must be how the loved one’s of those officers were feeling.

Clearly, he was going stir crazy being stuck in between the walls of the tiny apartment. He really wouldn’t have lasted in prison. He didn’t know his Seunghyun didn’t lose his mind. After all, the older man probably wasn’t passing any psych evaluations with flying colours any time soon as it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The conclusion will be posted in about an hour because I decided to split the conslusion into two chapters since it was so long. 2 for the price of one??
> 
> Feedback is always very welcome


	13. Leap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will their plan for a new life go smoothly? The final instalment is here!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> STOP RIGHT THERE! The final instalment has been split into two because it needed up kinda long for one chapter. I posted the previous part an hour or so ago so head back to chapter 12 before reading this one if you haven’t already! ^_^ 
> 
> Sorry this was so late,

Fake passports and plane tickets in their pockets, the pair wandered through a dark multi story parking lot. Jiyong looked like a kid in a candy store. Especially in the way he dragged Seunghyun around by his sleeve. 

“Oh this one!” Jiyong’s eyes lit up and he hurried over to a sleek looking silver sports car. 

“Flashy. Shouldn’t we be laying low?”

“I’m about to die. Surely I can steal whatever car I want. It’s a Mercedes. And the trunk is actually pretty big. Space for a body.”

“Fine, fine.” Because there was no point in arguing with Jiyong, anyway. 

Jiyong made his way over to the car and started to fiddle with the lock. “Come on, open up for me, baby. You’re gonna feel so good to drive.” He cooed to the vehicle. While Seunghyun stood watch.

“That was probably one of the creepiest things I’ve ever heard you say.” 

“Seunghyun, anyone ever tell you that you’ve got lovely skin? I sure can’t wait to wear it.” He said in a mock creepy voice and cackled jokingly. 

“No, somehow the last one was still creepier.”

The door clicked open. “Ok, let’s get her all turned on. Let me just reach down here under her dash. Never go straight for the steering wheel. You need to work up to that, slip off her housing first.” Jiyong put on his best dirty old man voice as he leaned down to the space under the steering wheel and popped off the cover. 

“I know you’re joking but actually I’m starting to think you really do have some kind of car fetish. I’m an open minded guy but if I catch you fucking a gas tank we might have to have some kind of conversation.” Seunghyun chuckled as Jiyong hotwired the car, the engine roaring to life. 

“Yeah baby I knew I’d get you going!”

“You’re such an idiot.” The blond laughed. 

“I’m your idiot.” 

“You sure are.” He climbed into the passenger side as Jiyong settled with his hands on the steering wheel with a look in his eye reminiscent of a kid on Christmas morning. 

“This thing is gonna have serious horsepower.”

“This isn’t Fast and Furious, if you drive like a crazy person we’ll get pulled over by the cops.”

“Spoil sport.” Jiyong pouted as he pulled off out of the parking lot. 

They planned to cruise around until they found someone either of their approximate builds. Preferably someone homeless, someone who wouldn’t be missed. The conversation dissipated as they drove. Seunghyun turned the blade over in his hands. This was different, he thought. This wouldn’t be like killing someone who hurt them or killing some who got in the way of business. This was just going to be two young men in the wrong place at the wrong time. He was relieved that he felt so apprehensive. Perhaps his soul wasn’t blackened all the way through after all. 

“You ok?” Jiyong piped up.

“Yeah.” Seunghyun nodded.

“Three of hose cops died y’know... when I was shooting outside the courthouse.”

“And how... how does that knowledge make you feel?”

“Strange. At first I didn't care. They were inconsequential to me. But then I thought about the people they left behind.” Jiyong sighed. “Does it get easier?”

“I don’t know.” Seunghyun looked back to the blade.

It didn’t take them long to find a man about Jiyong’s age and build. The guy was slumped in an alley spun out on fuck-knows-what. An early familiar scene to Jiyong himself. The guy probably didn’t know what hit him when the knife went into his carotid artery. Jiyong was watching from the rear view mirror as the guy was dragged, still twitching and bleeding into the trunk. In another time and place that could have been him.

They hid the body in the dumpster behind the hotel they’d be staying in before going out and claiming their second victim and hiding him in the same place. 

Cold and methodical. 

They had to be.

When they returned to to the hotel again after changing out of their bloody clothes, they checked in with their real names and acted as blatant as possible. Jiyong was being extra loud to attract attention of other guests, just to be sure. Attracting attention was frankly second nature to him, anyway. 

They broke into the service elevator and used it to bring the corpses to the room and two small tanks of butane the older had acquired from an industrial unit while Jiyong was in Seoul. Seunghyun did the heavy lifting while Jiyong was standing guard.

“Aren’t these things supposed to look like accidents?”

“A small fire like from a cigarette would set off the sprinklers in the room and get put out practically straight away. Makes sense we would commit suicide, though. To avoid jail and all that. Rather fitting to go out with a literal bang.” Seunghyun explained as he took a bottle of methylated spirit out of his bag, something they’d used before to sanitise crime scenes. “So, the idea is this rag burns down to the bottle and it should cause the bottle to explode and ignite the gasoline on the bed. That then ignites the butane in the air the ensuing inferno causes the butane tanks to explode for good measure.” He stuffed a rag into the neck of the bottle. 

“No such thing as overkill, huh?” Jiyong laughed. 

“Go wait in the car, I’ll see you down there.”

“Why? I wanna stay with you.”

“I’m not a chemistry professor or a professional arsonist. I don’t know exactly how this is gonna play out. Place could go boom as soon as I light the match.”

“I’m sorry but if we’re gonna get blown to smithereens, we’re doing it together. That’s what couples do, they do stuff together.” Jiyong pecked his cheek.

“I promise to take you on a normal boring date after this is all over. Something entirely less exciting than faking our own deaths or possibly dying in an explosion.”

“Sounds good to me!” 

“I can’t promise everything’s gonna be perfect, though.”

“Perfect is lame.”

“And I can’t promise I’ll be perfect, either. I can’t promise there won’t be nightmares and I can’t promise that terrible part of me won’t claw its way back up but I’ll fight it with everything I have.”

“I’ll be there for you. I’ll help you. I’ve always known that there was something scary in you but you’re also the person with the biggest heart I know and no amount of darkness can ever take that away. I pushed you because I could. I knew you would do terrible things for me. It’s not that I didn’t care I just.... did it anyway. My selfishness overtook me. I’m so sorry...” His eyes welled up as he spoke. 

“I know. I’m not an exception to your manipulation. Difference is I know when you’re doing it and I let you. Neither of us are perfect. You’re just as fucked in the head as I am. I’m still stupidly in love with you, though.” He pulled the redhead into a hug. 

“Can’t promise to be perfect, either. Can’t say I won’t ever step on people to get my own way. But I’ll do my best. What I can promise is that I’ll never step on you.” He sniffled. He wasn’t a sociopath. He felt remorse, a lot of it. 

“C’mon. Time to die.” Seunghyun murmured and placed a kiss to Jiyong’s cheek, stopping a tear in it’s tracks. When he pulled away it left an emptiness. “Go pull the fire alarm in the corridor. Probably should give everyone else a chance to get out. In case this works a little too well.”

As he walked out to the corridor, Jiyong found feel the anxiety start to prickle at his chest and hang heavy around his throat. He walked down the hallway to the fire alarm and took a long deep breath before pulling it. The sprinklers came on in the corridor but thankfully not in the rooms as the alarms sounded, when he walked back into the room the only thing in the air was the smell of gasoline as Seunghyun splashed it over the bodies on the bed. There was something visceral about seeing two corpses embracing one another on a gasoline soaked bed. Settling, almost.

Jiyong dug his hands into his pockets, fingers touching the tickets, passports and the Yen in there. They were really doing this. Starting new lives.

“Alright. Get ready to run. The service elevator will be quicker than the staircase.”

“Right.” Jiyong nodded and watched as Seunghyun opened the valves on the two butane tanks and walked back over to the bed. He looked so calm and collected. The opposite to how Jiyong felt. The blonde took his lighter out of his pocket and set down the bottle with the rag stuffed into it next to the gasoline soaked bed. Then he lit the rag. 

“Time to go!” He hopped up and they both headed out into the hallway and towards the elevator they’d brought the bodies up in. The the hallway was empty now that the people in the other rooms had evacuated. They heard the bottle exploding when they were about half way down the hallway. The first butane tank explosion came faster than they expected. They’d only just made it to the end of the hall when the deep boom shook the walls and floor, blowing concrete and dust into the corridor behind them. 

They quickly closed the service elevator door and hit the ground button until it descended to street level. The second explosion came when they were safely outside. By the time they jumped into the waiting car they could see the ensuing inferno at the hotel room window and spreading quickly through that whole floor. There was glass all over the street where the windows had been blown out and people were panicking around them. Jiyong’s hands were shaking as he touched the wires together under the dashboard, bringing the engine back to life. 

“Jiyong. Take a deep breath. It’s fine. You need to relax or you’ll drive like a lunatic and get us pulled over. Everything’s going according to plan. Don’t panic.” Seunghyun placed a steady hand on his shoulder.

“Y-Yeah. Sorry. I don’t know why I’m shaking so much.” Being clean was great and all but situations like this made him wish he was still on drugs so he didn’t have to deal with his anxiety.

“Breathe in and count to four. Then out counting to five.”

Jiyong did. The other man’s voice doing just as much to calm his nerves as the breathing exercise. After a few seconds he hit the gas, pulling out into the street as fire engines roared past. They were gonna do this. They were gonna leave the country and be together. The world wasn’t gonna rip them apart, he wouldn’t let it.

 

 

——————

 

 

They had decided to fly from the airport in Busan, since it would be more likely people would be on the look out for them at Incheon. The drive was long and they changed cars twice, Seunghyun driving for the second half of the journey. It was weird, considering their situation last time they were in Busan. 

They both managed to sleep while the other was driving, exhausted from the day’s efforts. 

When they reached the airport to check in for their flight, Jiyong started to get nervous again. The panic starting to set back in. What if security recognised them? Fortunately, it was busy so their faces were more likely to blend into the crowd. At the security gate, Jiyong let Seunghyun go on a few people ahead so it didn’t look as though they were travelling together. 

It went off without a hitch. 

Almost. 

Of course, Jiyong forgot to remove his belt and consequently the buzzer sounded as he passed through the metal detector. He almost jumped right out of his skin. Fortunately, a brief frisking and a stern look from security was all that came of it. Seunghyun was laughing as he joined him the other side. 

“I’m sure you did that on purpose so you’d get a guy’s hands all over you.”

“No! It was embarrassing! I was to busy worrying about not looking suspicious and forgot to take my belt off!”

“You did look pretty shifty. One more drop of sweat away from a cavity search, I’d say. You’d have loved that.” He laughed. 

“Only fingers I want up my ass are yours or my own. Certainly not a gross middle aged security guard with a latex glove and cold lube.” 

Seunghyun laughed again and slung an arm around his shoulder. “Let’s to get some food, flight isn’t for ages.”

Jiyong couldn't quite relax in their airport, either. He envied the blonde’s apparent calmness. After they grabbed food he’d paced up and down for a while, constantly checking the departures board and clinging to his passport and ticket like his life depended on it. His life probable did really depend on it.

Seunghyun knew better than to question him when he was like this. It would only make him worse so it was best to just let him get on with it. He just made sure to keep an eye on him.

When they eventually got to their seats on the plane, Jiyong couldn't even sit back he was so tense.

“I know you’re nervous but you’re starting to make me nervous, too.” Seunghyun piped up.

“Sorry. I’m just thinking about immigration. What if they don’t let us through?”

“It’ll be fine.”

“Shit. Last time I flew to Japan I was 20 years old and had swallowed 15 condoms full of heroin beforehand. My stomach feels just as uneasy this time and I’m not smuggling drugs in my stomach.” 

“How ‘bout we practice some boarder control appropriate Japanese?” Seunghyun suggested. 

“Ok, fine.”

“I’ll give you the Korean and you tell me the Japanese. Ready?”

“Shoot.”

“Thank you.”

“Arigatou gozaimasu.”

“Good. Yes and no?”

“Hai and iie.”

“What about ordering coffee?”

“I don’t think I’ll need to order a coffee from an immigration official.” Jiyong rolled his eyes. “But sure. Sumimasen, hotto kohi o hitotsu kudasai.”

“And what country have you been visiting, Sir?”

“South Ko— Uh... hang on. I know this one.” Jiyong wracked his brain. “Kan... Kankoku?”

“Yup.”

“See? I’m practically fucking fluent in Japanese!”

“Nihon no doko kara kita no desu ka”

“Osaka!” The redhead gave a double thumbs up. 

“Huh. Well done. Didn’t expect you to get that one.”

“Ye of little faith.” Jiyong smiled, feeling a little more relaxed for the duration of the short flight.

He stayed mostly quiet, though. Running through his lines like a script over and over in his head so he wouldn’t fuck up. He really hoped his accent would sound authentic. He would keep his answers short and sweet, just in case. 

Despite all his mental prepping, Jiyong had never felt so tense in his life when they disembarked the plane. Security in Gimhae had made him sweat but now this really was make or break. The final hurdle to get over. As they stood in line for Japanese citizens at immigration control in Kansai International he felt like every eye in the room was on them. On him especially. He shook his head, trying to convince himself he was being irrational. God, he could really do with a hit of something, anything, right now.

“Don’t worry. Just remember to make your Japanese sound natural.” Seunghyun said quietly. “Want me to go first?”

Jiyong nodded. 

He watched as Seunghyun was called forward and asked to remove his face mask. He handed his fake passport over. He looked so calm and collected while Jiyong was sweating bullets from just watching. He was acutely aware of how suspicious he must look which only made him even more nervous. 

He let out a breath he’d been holding when Seunghyun was let through. But his relief was short lived as he was called forward. It was so fucking hot and humid in the crowded hall. He felt like he was choking and he was willing his hands to stop shaking before he had to take them out of his pockets and hand over the passport. He couldn't fucking breathe, his chest was full of lead.

He stepped forward and pulled his mask down off his face and slid the passport across the desk.

The man across the desk said something along the lines of “Yokoso” which Jiyong just about recognised. Shit. He really needed to focus. The man looked at the passport and then at him. Then back at the passport. Was he frowning? Shit. This was it. 

At least Seunghyun made it through, right?

Jiyong’s heart was in his throat. He’d probably be arrested for the fake passport and then they’d work out who he really was. The ringing was coming back to his ears and he felt like his stomach was trying to jump out of his mouth. 

His chest hurt. 

Then the passport was passed back over to him and he was waved through. 

He blinked in disbelief a couple of times. 

Thank fuck. He’d been on the edge of passing out. 

“Arigatou gozaimasu.” Jiyong mumbled quickly as he walked through, trying not to run. He could feel sweat making his hair stick to his forehead and the back of his neck as he walked into the cool air off baggage reclaim. 

Seunghyun had already gone on ahead, moved along by security. He was waiting for Jiyong where the younger would see him. And sure enough, as soon as Jiyong spotted him he almost tackled him to the ground, throwing his arms around him and almost making them both lose their balance. 

“C’mon, Ji, I’ll feel better once we’re out of the airport.” Seunghyun grinned and kissed his forehead and took his hand, leading him out through international arrivals to the JR station. 

“Thought that fucker was gonna reject me for sure.”

“I was nervous, too. Thought I was gonna have a heart attack.” He ran his hand through his own hair.

“You were nervous?! You looked cool as a cucumber! Fuck. You should be an actor.”

Seunghyun shrugged. “Now comes the next challenge.”

“Establishing a life with no money or identity and a limited ability to speak the native language?”

“No. Well yes. But I was talking about staying out of trouble. We really gonna do that?”

“Hmm...” He hummed low to himself. “For now, yeah. There’s plenty of options for illegal immigrants who need work off the books. Right? Dodgy employers who wanna be able to pay less than a minimum wage.”

“You may actually have to get your hands dirty, Jiyong!”

“Fuck off, I’m not the princess people think I am!” He shoved the blonde playfully. “We lived on the bones of our asses for most of our lives. We can handle this. If I get sick of the hard graft I’ll just marry some rich old Japanese cougar.”

“You might be getting a bit old for cougars. No offence.”

“Depends how old the cougar is.” Jiyong giggled.

“Rich old ladies want suave and handsome, not bratty and androgynous. If someone’s bagging himself an old widow, it’s me.”

“Ok, deal. You sling your sausage into a wrinkly old cave and I’ll be your mistress.” Jiyong grinned. 

Seunghyun laughed and threw his arm around Jiyong’s shoulders, pulling him in. “Nah, don’t think it’ll come to that. We’re good at having nothing. I think I preferred it, actually.”

“I’ve never had nothing.” Jiyong said softly and leaned into him as they walked towards the train. “Because I have you by my side.”

“Til the end. No matter what.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who stuck with this story!

**Author's Note:**

> Constructive criticism will be well received!  
> Thanks for reading


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